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Politics : I Will Continue to Continue, to Pretend....
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To: Sully- who wrote (20125)8/4/2006 2:24:09 PM
From: Sully-   of 35834
 
Heh! Heh! Hat Tip to Bill

The Honorable Olympia Snowe
The Honorable Susan Collins
Senate Office Building
Washington DC, 20510

Dear Senators Snowe & Collins:

As a native Mainer and excellent customer of the Internal Revenue
Service, I am writing to ask for your assistance. I have contacted the
Immigration and Naturalization Service in an effort to determine the process
for becoming an illegal alien and they referred me to both of you.

My reasons for wishing to change my status from U.S. Citizen to illegal
alien stem from the bill which was recently passed by the Senate and for
which you voted. If my understanding of this bill's provisions are
accurate, as an illegal alien who has been in the United States for five
years, what I need to do to become a citizen is to pay a $2,000 fine and
income taxes for three of the last five years.

I know a good deal when I see one and I am anxious to get the process
started before everyone figures it out. Simply put, those of us who have
been here legally have had to pay taxes every year so I'm excited about the
prospect of avoiding two years of taxes in return for paying a $2,000 fine.

Is there any way that I can apply to be illegal retroactively? This
would yield an excellent result for me and my family because we paid heavy
taxes for the last 20 years.

Another benefit in gaining illegal status would be that my daughter would
receive preferential treatment relative to her law school applications. If
you would provide me with an outline of the process to become illegal
(retroactively if possible) and copies of the necessary forms, I would be
most appreciative.

Thank you for your assistance.
Your Loyal Constituent,
Clarence Daggett
Cundy's Harbor, Maine
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