***TAKE A BREAK***
WHAT IF MICROSOFT BUILT CARS
*Every time they repainted the lines on the road, you'd have
to buy a new car.
*Occasionally your car would just die on the motorway for no
known reason. You'd just accept this, restart and drive on.
*Occasionally, executing a maneuver would cause your car to
stop and fail to restart and you'd have to re-install the engine.
For some strange reason, you'd just accept this, too.
*You could only have one person in the car at a time, unless
you bought a "Car 95" or a "Car NT." But then you'd have to
buy a bigger engine.
*Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun,
was twice as reliable, just as fast, twice as easy to drive-but it
would only run on 5% of the roads.
*The Macintosh car owners would get expensive Microsoft
upgrades to their cars which would make their cars go much
slower.
*The oil, engine, gas and alternator warning lights would be
replaced with a single "General Car Fault" warning light.
*People would get excited about the "new" features in
Microsoft cars, forgetting completely that they had been
available in other cars for many years.
*We'd all have to switch to Microsoft gas and all auto fluids,
but the packaging would be superb.
*New seats would force everyone to have the same size
"behind."
*The airbag system would say, "Are you sure?" before going
off.
*If you were involved in a crash, you would have no idea
what happened.
*They wouldn't build their own engines, but would form a
cartel with their engine suppliers. The latest engine would
have 16 cylinders, multi-point fuel injection and four turbos,
but it would be a side-valve design so you could use Model-T
Ford parts on it.
*There would be an "Engium Pro" with bigger turbos, but it
would be slower on most existing roads.
*Microsoft cars would have a special radio/cassette player
which would only be able to listen to Microsoft FM, and play
Microsoft Cassettes-unless, of course, you buy the upgrade to
use existing stuff.
*Microsoft would do so well, because even though they don't
own any roads, all of the road manufacturers would give
away Microsoft cars free, including IBM!
*If you still ran old versions of Car (i.e. CarDOS 6.22 /
CarWIN 3.11), then you would be called old fashioned, but
you would be able to drive much faster, and on more roads!
*If you couldn't afford to buy a new car, then you could just
borrow your friends, and then copy it.
*Whenever you bought a car, you would have to reorganize
the ignition for a few days before it would work.
*You would need to buy an upgrade to run cars on a
motorway next to each other. |
