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Pastimes : Favorite Quotes

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To: 10K a day who wrote (7041)1/5/2003 11:38:22 AM
From: HG   of 13018
 
Dear Impristine,

I'm writing this letter slow, because I know you cannot read fast. We don't live where we did when you left home. Your uncle read in the paper that most accidents happen 20 miles from your home, so we moved. I won't be able to send you the address as the last redneck who stayed here took the house numbers with them for their next house, so they wouldn't have to change their address.

This place is really nice. It even has a washing machine, situated right above the commode. I'm not sure it works too well. Last week I put in 3 shirts, pulled the chain and haven't seen them since. The weather here isn't too bad. It rained only twice last week. The first it rained for 3 days and second time for 4 days. The coat you wanted me to send you, your Aunt said it would be a little too heavy to send in the mail with all the metal buttons, so we cut them off and put them in the pocket. Your uncle Sam has another job. He has 500 men under him. He is cutting the grass at the cemetery.

Your sister had a baby this morning. I haven't found out whether it's a girl or a boy, so I don't know whether you are an Aunt or Uncle. Your uncle, Jack fell in a the nearby well. Some men tried to pull him out, but he fought them off bravely and drowned. We cremated him and he burned for three days. Your best friend, Harry, is no more. He died trying to fulfil his father's last wishes. His father had wished to be buried in the sea after he died. And your friend died while in the process of digging a grave for his father. There isn't much more news this time. Nothing much has happened.

Love,

HG

P. S : I was going to send you some money but the envelope was sealed.
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