funphone.com
Foreign Ownership of U.S. Financial Chat Boards:
an Important Message for Investors
from
Former Chairman Harvey L. Pitt
U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission
Washington, D.C.
April 1, 2003
Ay yo, wassup, investaz? Tha H-Daddy is in tha house for y’all!
I spec y’all be readin this big news and you aksing yo selves, wass with tha iHUB?
How come tha Canatout posse buyin' tha Investa Hub message board, with tha stoopid-fast intaface, all tha HTML with tha kung fu grip, an all tha badass features tha homies want? Tha site where all tha eyeball-grabbin' heavy hitta big-time posta-playaz be hangin'?
Yo, Harve-dog, you aks, won' tha Canay-jun promota posse be all pumpin' an’ dumpin' they scam-ass micro-cap warez all over tha site, an’ doin’ tha freaky naked-ass shortin’?
I be tellin' y'all investaz straight, be chillin' - tha H-Daddy gots you covered!
First thing I say is, mad props goin' to Phatt-Matt an' Bob tha Z-Dog! They gots tha mad benjamins out this deal wit tha Canatoutz, but they be smart muthaz too, coz they gots tha H-Dog yourz truly as tha private adviza on tha tran-zak-shun!
An' I be here to make sure tha iHUB ain' be no Safe Harbo for no hypestaz!
We gots tha SEC bruthas an sistas all readin' what tha peeps be postin' 24-7, y'all, an when we find tha postz sayin sheet like big newz comin' soon or this bitch be payin' dividenz nex year fo sho, then we be puttin tha pumpa freakz names in tha big-ass 3-ring binda, an takin' care of bidness with tha stone-cole humorless message from John Reed Stark, then come tha ceasin' and desistin', maybe even tha tradin' suspenshun, word up.
So I gots jus' one message for tha promota-playaz who thinkin' bout pumpin' here on tha iHUB: stay over on tha Ray-gin' Bull hood where y'all belong, homies, else I git all Sarbanes-Oxley on yo ass!
Word.
Oh sure, I ain't no Chair-brutha of tha SEC krew no mo' on count of how I wuz force to re-zign my own ass, but I still be tha big bad-ass playa in tha financial world, y'all, I still gots tha mainline connec-shunz and tha inside trak to tha main man, his Dukeship Alan Greenspang!
I ain't ready to retire my ass in no re-inforce lounga in Flor-ee-dah, an' eatin' tha early-birdz special dinna at 3 in tha affnoon, sheet no!
I still be in tha back-groun' in tha beltway, sorta tha eminenz-greez, influencin' tha finance muthas behin' tha scenes, y'all. An' all them fly hos at Treasury still wanna be knockin' tha bootz with tha H-Daddy, sho-nuff.
Shout-out to all tha investaz bin sendin' us tha luv at enforcement@sec.gov, y'all know who y'are.
H-Daddy OUT. |
