Best of the Web Today - April 5, 2007
By JAMES TARANTO
Today's Videos on WSJ.com: Dan Henninger on Iraq and the Democrats, and Jason Riley on malaria in Africa.
This Just In: We're All Gonna Die!
The Associated Press reports from the United Nations on a new study that sounds troubling, if not alarming:
The number of diagnosed cancer cases will more than double between 2000 and 2030, primarily in poorer countries, the director of the International Agency for Research on Cancer said Tuesday.
Dr. Peter Boyle said the reasons for the increase include population growth, longer life expectancy, more people smoking in the developing world and a lack of health care in poor countries.
Whoa, stop right there. The AP story never elaborates on the assertion that "a lack of health care in poor countries" will contribute to an increase in cancer diagnoses. On the surface, this seems to make sense, if you view it according to a sort of rote do-goodism: Health care is good, cancer is bad, cancer has to do with health, so more health care would mean less cancer.
But in fact the claim is utterly illogical, and its inclusion in the list reflects a failure of critical thinking on the part of reporter Carley Petesch. (We'll give Boyle the benefit of the doubt, since Petesch only paraphrases him.)
For one thing, the claim is that there will be a large increase the number of diagnosed cancer cases. You don't get diagnosed unless you have health care, so a lack of health care would actually help reduce the number of diagnosed cancer cases (though it would increase the number of cases that go untreated because they are never or not quickly enough diagnosed).
For another, cancer is primarily a disease of old age, and better health care means that more people reach old age--another reason an increase in cancer diagnoses is good news. The AP dispatch actually makes this point:
An increase in life expectancy in the majority of countries, with the exception of some AIDS-ravaged countries in Africa, also is leading to a rise in cancer cases, [Boyle] said.
Both China and India have continual growth in the number of people reaching older ages, Boyle said. "So if you've got more old people in the population with the same risks as the younger people, you're going to have more cases of cancer in the older population," he said.
By contrast, a lack of health care in poor countries means that more people die young of infectious diseases and other treatable causes, and therefore they do not live long enough to be diagnosed with cancer. Remember, death is like the chickenpox. You only get it once.
It's All About Jenny Ballantine
Rush Limbaugh has a fascinating transcript from a town-hall meeting John and Elizabeth Edwards held at the University of New Hampshire Monday. They were questioned by an undergraduate named Jenny Ballantine, who had this to say:
I need to be able to look to my leader and see words of encouragement, words of hope. I need to be able to trust that person. I need to be able to know that I'm going to be grow [sic in transcript] in a world that's not going to be full of hate and prejudice and racism and to know that I matter, that I wasn't just dumped in this world for no particular reason whatsoever.
I'm busting my ass in school, I work 25 to 30 hours a week, and it's just me and my dog. So what can you do for the people that are in my situation, that are trying their damnedest in school, wanting to go to grad school, is going to be hit with the loans--and, uh, I have no idea what I want to do when I grow up. I don't know what I want to be when I'm an adult. But I'm 22 right now, so people are like, "Honey, you are an adult." You know what? It's about me. It's about me voting for you or supporting somebody who's going to be the next president. So it's all about me right now. Just give me something.
Here is how the Edwardses responded:
Mr. Edwards: God bless you. If I were choosing a president, uh, that's what I'd be doing. I'd be looking for the specifics of what they want to do, because that matters, but I would also be judging them personally, because we need to trust our president.
Mrs. Edwards: I want to say something, too. I was really impressed with you, Jenny Ballantine, and I think probably everybody in this room was, and I want everybody in this room who believes that Jenny Ballantine is going to be able to do it to give her a round of applause.
According to Foster's Daily Democrat of Dover, N.H., the audience gave Miss Ballantine not only a round of applause by a standing ovation.
And so, my fellow Americans: Ask not what your country can do for you. Ask what your country can do for Jenny Ballantine!
Fox News
President Bush has given Sam Fox a recess appointment as ambassador to Belgium. The president withdrew the nomination last week after Democrats on the Senate Foreign Relations Committee made clear that they would not allow it to advance to the floor, where he presumably would have been confirmed. At least two Democrats, Joe Lieberman of Connecticut and Claire McCaskill of Missouri, had said they supported Fox.
Committee Dems united behind John Kerry*, who was bitter because Fox had donated money to the Swift Boat Veterans for Truth, which in 2004 rebutted Kerry's claim to have been a war hero in Vietnam. Washington Post blogress Mary Ann Akers reports that the Democrats are hoping to run Fox out of Brussels anyway:
To fight the Fox appointment, Democrats are questioning the Bush administration's plan to have Fox serve in a voluntary capacity--receiving no pay for his duties as ambassador. This is an important legal technicality, as federal law prohibits "payment of services" for certain recess appointments. However, if the recess appointee in question agrees that he or she will take an unpaid position and not sue the government at a later date for compensation, then the appointment can go forward, at least as the White House sees it. . . .
But here's the rub that makes Democrats view Bush's recess appointment of Fox as a major-league no-no: Federal law prohibits "voluntary service" in cases where the position in question has a fixed rate of pay, as an ambassadorship does. That's how the Government Accountability Office, an arm of the Democratic-controlled Congress, interprets the law.
In other words, according to senior Democratic Senate aides, the salary is a "statutory entitlement" and cannot be waived. . . .
"How to reconcile this clear conflict between the pay restriction, which says that Fox cannot be paid, with the voluntary services provision, which says that the State Department cannot accept voluntary services from Fox?" queried one senior Democratic aide who asked for anonymity to speak frankly about the matter.
It's good to know that the Democrats in Congress are so concerned with the serious problems facing the country. Sorry, we mean facing Jenny Ballantine.
* At least he served in Vietnam, unlike Barack Obama!
This'll Have Greens Seeing Red
Don't be alarmed, but the planet is getting hotter. According to the latest computer models, surface air temperatures rose by 1.17 degrees Fahrenheit just between the 1970s and the '90s. Earlier estimates had the Earth warming by 1.33 degrees over an entire century.
Hey, we told you not to be alarmed. It's Mars that's warming--"four times faster than Earth," according to Agence France-Presse:
The explanation is in the dirt.
Glistening Martian dust lying on the ground reflects the Sun's light--and its heat--back into space, a phenomenon called albedo.
But when this reddish dust is churned up by violent winds, the storm-ravaged surface loses its reflective qualities and more of the Sun's heat is absorbed into the atmosphere, causing temperatures to rise. . . .
Exactly what triggers the planet's so-called "global dust storms" remains a mystery.
We'll bet it's little green men driving their SUVs off-road.
World Ends, Etc.
"Dropout Rate Hits Record Low: High school--Officials worry about an increase in minority students not getting degrees"--headline and subheadline, Oregonian, April 4
Hey, Show a Little Respect for the Dead!
"Man Shot by Pistol Thrown in the Trash"--headline, Associated Press, April 4
Maybe They Went to the Doughnut Shop
"State Police Looking for New Troopers"--headline, Oregonian, April 4
Korean Women Aren't Allowed in the Capital?
"Paraguayan First Lady in Seoul"--headline, Korea Times, April 4
Do They Admit Shredding Them?
"Belgium Local Authorities Deny Barbequing Tax Reports"--headline, Novosti (Russia), April 4
Say What?
"Porn Swap Sparks Japan Defense Leak Furore"--healdine, Reuters, April 5
Bottom Stories of the Day
o "No Honors for Auburn's Black Squirrels"--headline, Indianapolis Star, April 5
o "Grape-Thrower Misfires at School Board Meeting"--headline, Detroit Free Press, April 5
o "Murfreesboro Not Selected for Plant Site"--headline, Murfreesboro (Tenn.) Post, April 5
o "Clooney Gives Kids $20 for Lemonade"--headline, CNN.com, April 5
o "Carter Backs Pelosi's Trip, Despite Bush's Rebuke"--headline, CNN.com, April 4
Obama-Piper '08
Chug, chug, chug. Puff, puff, puff. Ding-dong, ding-dong. The little train rumbled over the tracks. Her cars were full of good things for boys and girls.
Then all of a sudden she stopped with a jerk. She simply could not go another inch. She tried and she tried, but her wheels would not turn.
"Here comes a shiny new engine," said the funny little clown who jumped out of the train. "Let us ask him to help us." But the Shiny New Engine snorted: "I am a Passenger Engine. My train has parlor cars in which people sit in soft arm-chairs and look out of big plate-glass windows. I pull the likes of you? Indeed not!"
The Rusty Old Engine sighed: "I am so tired. I must rest my weary wheels. I cannot pull even so little a train as yours over the mountain. I can not. I can not. I can not."
"Oh, Little Blue Engine," cried the dolls and toys. "Will you pull us over the mountain?" Then she said, "I think I can. I think I can. I think I can." She tugged and pulled and pulled and tugged and slowly, slowly, slowly they started off.
Too slowly to keep up with the Shiny New Engine, as the Associated Press reports:
With a stunning $25 million fundraising haul for his presidential campaign, Democrat Barack Obama affirmed his status Wednesday as Hillary Rodham Clinton's chief rival. . . .
[Mrs.] Clinton was at home in New York Wednesday and had no comment on Obama's announcement. But her campaign manager, Patti Solis Doyle, issued a statement congratulating Obama and said the fundraising of all the Democratic contenders "demonstrates the overwhelming desire for chug in our country."
Chug, chug, chug. Puff, puff, puff. We didn't think she could.
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