I think it is a disease. It seems to build up and I need to spew.
In getting ready to and implementing my second go around, I realized that for maybe the first time in my life, here was something that was more about me than anyone else. For most mothers / fathers that isn't something they are used to. For so long, life is all about providing. For ourselves, but mostly for our kids. Everyone wants their kids to have it better than they did.
We paid for our daughters college educations. I figure that is enough. I have a buddy that has told me that someday he wants to buy his daughter a house. More power to you dude, but what is she going to do? Isn't there something to be said for providing too much, instead of expecting something? I guess everyone looks at it differently, but I look at working for what you get as life experience.
Even paying for college for my daughters, right up front I told them that we would pay for four years. I don't care if the average kid takes longer. Your job is to get it done in four or pay for the rest yourself. Both had no problem finishing in four years.
Anyway, with the kids out of the road, let's get back to me. :)
I'm not poor, but I've been poor. I'm not rich and never will be, unless the wife hits the lottery. I can't afford a world cruise, but I can afford a cross country tour. You just have to mesh what you have with what you want. If your wants exceed what you can afford, I guess you need to go back to, or keep on working.
I've had two good friends die in '08 and have a sister-in-law who may not see Christmas because of pancreatic cancer. One friend was still working. The other died within a year of turning 65. He worked until he was 65 as a truck driver because his social security benefit would be bigger.
I don't know the ins and outs of their lives. I don't know how much interacting with other people kept them working. Many people need that interaction. My mother talks of it all the time. Her need to "get out among people". At 78 she bowls in a league once a week, goes for breakfast with the girls, and waitresses at a local club three or four nights a week. The time will come when she can't do it anymore. Future sadness for us both.
Damn it, this is supposed to be about me! :)
I like alone time. Always have. Maybe it was formed in me when I was a kid. It wasn't a development we lived in, just five houses sitting along the road. Two of these houses were off limits to me. I rode the school bus with the kids that lived in those two houses. I have to admit one set of kids, all three boys, was a little wild. The other set, a boy and a girl, were the nicest most well behaved kids you could ever meet. I know the girl became the weather girl on a semi-local TV station. I don't know about the boy.
My old man let me know in no uncertain terms that I would have a warm backside if I played with those "black kids".
There house was on the corner where we had to catch the school bus. I don't think he ever knew that they let us wait inside on bad weather days.
I'm sure he would have been surprised at our Thanksgiving dinner the year my oldest spent living in the french house when she was a senior in college. She called to ask if she could bring some friends knowing it didn't matter what race they were. We ended up sitting down to dinner with a girl from Turkey, one from France, and three African boys, that I can't recall their countries. Raspberries dad. But I love you anyway.
The other two houses had two girls apiece. They couldn't throw stones, didn't want to go fishin', could care less about my bb gun, and always had to go back to the house to go to the bathroom. Other than playing a little doctor, they weren't worth much to a young boy. With my bb gun my constant companion, I could fill the day just being in the woods, climbing rocks, trees, and flipping rocks in the creek just to see what was under them.
You need to figure out who you are and what you want before you retire. If you need that interaction, plan ahead. Going cold turkey could lead to depression.
Other than family time, I do wings twice a month at a local pub with two old buddies and breakfast once a month with another. That's enough for me.
If any of us knew when our last day was we surely would want to spend it with family. What if it was your last day and you couldn't be with family? Drink a few brews with friends at your favorite hang out? Go to Disney World, Vegas, Cancun? Find a hooker that is willing to play escaped convict and the wardens wife? Ever thought about it?
I'd spend it with my two dogs in my garden. Although nothing is growing, since I have re-retired (lol) we've spent time tilling up new ground and just generally cleaning up and putting things away. They make me smile every day. If it is warm enough for me to be barefoot, all the better.
Doing what I want to do, that's retirement for me.
Though we have had laying hens for a few years, I got a rooster from a friend and I have an incubator fired up, seeing if I can hatch some eggs. I'll candle them Sunday and see if I am doing anything right. I hope so. The wife is looking forward to peeps. I know I could buy them cheaper but that's no fun.
Organization never being a strong point for myself or my wife, I have had the time to go through things, getting rid of the clutter that collects in busy lives. I'm sure the garbage man has cursed me the last few weeks.
Though my old garden cart wasn't exactly made for it, I used it to pull 55 gallon drums of water from my tanks to the garden and it has seen it's last. I tore an old Troy Bilt tiller that was no good down to the transmission housing and wheels and am in the process of figuring out how I will make a new cart out of it. It will definitely handle a 55 gallon drum of water. Thinking that I may make interchangeable tops to go on the chassis for hauling different things.
Thought I might want to stay away from trading stocks because I didn't want to become a toad sitting in front of the computer. But I like it too much. Maybe that is my interaction.
Worked a long time to find that one thing that works and finally seems like I am there. Best thing about it is that I know the night before if there is anything there for me. If there is I don't mind spending the morning on the computer. If there isn't I don't even have to fire it up. Of course when it is freezing outside the computer can be your friend. I've begun a list of topics I would like to know more about for the coming winter doldrums.
Also in my mind is a work in progress for a roadside produce stand. My oldest suggested a sign for it. Cletus's Funny Farm.
Says she is going to get me a pair of bib overalls for Christmas to go with my straw hat. I just let her have fun, knowing full well that even with her college education, odds are I beat her at Jeopardy the next time we watch it.
For me, it is no longer about gathering money, being in charge, feeling important, or being a part of something.
Simple things for a simple mind is working for me.
My hope is that whatever you do in retirement makes you happy.
What the hell are you doing anyway? |
