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Politics : Formerly About Advanced Micro Devices
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To: Jim McMannis who wrote (310932)11/17/2006 1:33:04 AM
From: zonkie  Read Replies (1) of 1577020
 
Agenda for the Repugs National Convention for 2007:

7:00 P.M. All in attendance turn to your neighbor, give them the finger and say "go fuck yourself."

7:15 P.M. Band plays Springtime for Hitler, all salute and sing along.

7:30 P.M. Cub Scouts wearing g-strings perform lapdances for congressmen and women.

7:30 P.M. All bow towards Texas and pray to GW Bush.

8:00 P.M. Speech on family values by Jeff Gannon.

8:05 P.M. George H W Bush - Watch my lips - throws up.

8:15 P.M. Honorable Senator from Utah Orrin Hatch introduces his three wives who give talk about sanctity of marriage.

8:30 P.M. Jack Abramoff passes out bribes to all.

8:35 P.M. Moment of silence for Duke Cunningham.

9:00 P.M. Keynote speech. Barbara Bush - Why the blacks were so lucky to be hit by Hurricane Katrina.

9:15 P.M. Moment of silence for Tom Ney.

9:20 P.M. Collection to benefit Tom delay defence fund.

9:30 P.M. Unveiling of patriot act 3 by Alberto Gonzales. Last 4 articles of bill of rights repealed.

9:40 P.M. Rush Limbaugh passes out oxycontin to children.

9:45 P.M. Ralph Reid - The bible meant to say 10% for church and 10% for republicans.

9:50 P.M. Fox news gives preview of next 4 months of trumped up charges against Democrats.

9:55 P.M. Mark Foley unveils plan to teach young boys the joys of learning how to communicate on internets.

10:00 P.M. Many common substances which look like anthrax. - by Andrew Coulter.

10:15 P.M. Michele Malkin passes out addresses of leading democrats.

10:30 P.M. Bill O'Reilly - How much should you spend to make sexual harassment charges disappear.

11:00 P.M. Catfight between Kindalazy Rice and Laura Bush.

11:05 P.M. Ted Haggard - How prayer can sometimes be even better than a good massage.

11:15 P.M. Why so many prisoners died while not even being tortured - by Don Rumsfeld.

11:30 P.M. Dick Cheney on cooking with coal.

12:00 A.M. Haliburton, Exxon, Enron, Carlyle Group announce this quarters dividend for republican congressmen.

12:05 A.M. Swift boaters lead attendees in chorus of "If we only had a brain.".

12:15 George W Bush declares martial law, cancels election.
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