Gay Politician Arrested, Snared in Straight-Sex Scandal
This is hilarious!
The gay community in San Francisco is reeling after the shocking arrest of one of its most outspoken and beloved leaders. Ted Sand, an openly homosexual councilman representing San Francisco's fifth district, was taken into custody early Wednesday morning, charged with drunk driving and reckless endangerment.
Also arrested was his passenger, Betty Knox, an exotic dancer at the Tender Pussycat, a gentlemen's club in nearby Oakland.
Despite reports that police suspect Sand was engaged in a dangerous high-speed sex act with Knox, the 12-term councilman defiantly told the San Francisco Chronicle he had no improper relations with the 31-year-old mother of two, and was "just giving her a ride home."
[ I hope he did the Clinton thing: "I did not have sex with that woman." ]]
To complicate matters, attorney Gloria Allred issued a statement yesterday claiming she represents a "very biological" woman from San Mateo, Calif., who is also in a sexual relationship with Sand.
Sand has long been one of the country's leading advocates for marriage equality. However, some of his more controversial stances -- such as proposing a global warming tax be levied against all "breeders" -- have rankled members of both the straight and gay political establishment.
"I don't know what to think," said Willem Chambers, a spokesman for the Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Discrimination (GLAAD). "Sure, we are extremely disappointed, and slightly disgusted. But even if it's true, it will never take away from all he's accomplished for our community."
Gay politicians trying to cover up their straight-sex scandals? Now that sounds like the kind of equality Sand has long fought for.
asylum.com
PS I know this was filed on 4/1 but I don't care ... its too good not to post. Please let it be real. |
