ONE BETTER THAN THAT
A guy named Pugs was moderately successful in his career, but as he got older
he was increasingly hampered by incredible headaches. When his
personal hygiene and love life started to suffer, he sought medical
help. After being referred from one specialist to another, he
finally came across a doctor who offered a solution:
"The good news is that I can cure your headaches. The bad news is
that it will require castration. You have a very rare condition which
causes your testicles to press up against the base of your spine. The
pressure creates one hell of a headache. The only way to relieve the
pressure is to remove the testicles."
Pugs was shocked and depressed. He wondered if he had anything to live
for. He couldn't concentrate long enough to answer, but decided he
had no choice but to go under the knife. When he left the hospital,
his mind was clear, but he felt like he was missing an important part
of himself. As he walked down the street, he realized that he felt
like a different person. He could make a new beginning and live a new
life.
He walked past a men's clothing store and thought, "That's what I
need -- a new suit." He entered the shop and told the salesman,
"I'd like a new suit."
The salesman eyed him briefly and said, "Let's see... size 44 long."
Pugs laughed, "That's right, how did you know?"
"It's my job.", the salesman said.
Pugs tried on the suit. It fit perfectly. As Pugs admired himself
in the mirror, the salesman asked, "How about a new shirt?"
Pugs thought for a moment and then said, "Sure."
The salesman eyed Pugs and said, "Let's see 34 sleeve and ... 16
and a half neck."
Pugs was surprised, "That's right, how did you know?"
"It's my job."
Pugs tried on the shirt, and it fit perfectly. As Pugs adjusted the
collar in the mirror, the salesman asked, "How about new shoes?"
Pugs was on a roll and said, "Sure."
The salesman eyed Pugs' feet and said, "Let's see...
9 and a half ... wide."
Pugs was astonished, "That's right, how did you know?"
"It's my job."
Pugs was feeling great, when the salesman asked, "How about some
new underwear?"
Pugs thought for a second and said, "Sure."
The salesman stepped back, eyed Pugs' waist and said,"Let's
see ...size 36."
Pugs laughed, "No, I've worn size 34 since I was 18 years old."
The salesman shook his head, "You can't wear a size 34. It
would press your testicles up against the base of your spine and
give you one heck of a headache.
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