ALTERED STATES DISTRICT COURT
INTERGALATIC PRETEND ™
SMALL OUTER DISTRICT OF 3D ALIENS ™
AT THE EDGE OF STUPID MAMMAL REALITY
IN THE MATTER OF: Ex turpi causa non oritur actio bubbleicious
Comes now heretofore as it were vertical and with many colors with long loading time ex cetera pro bone ex aequo et bono
cOUSIN SHORTY ™ (gigantic alien flying reptile ™),
Plaintiff
v.
TOBY RICHER ™ (actual small tiny hairless mammal),
Defendant.
NO. 4%2345343333.n/awards/silliness/small_mammals.boof-embed_framing_hammer.ex-post-facto.anim
OBJECTION TO SUBPOENA NAMING FICTITIOUS CARTOON CHARACTER ™ AND LET’S GET READY TO RUMBLE THE BOX IS LOCKED THE LIGHTS ARE ON IT’S ROBOT FIGHTIN’ TIME IN THE MATTER BEFORE US ON THE LEFT PART OF THE SCREEN
Your honor, and I mean that in the most sincere and subservient way, on behalf of SpongeBob, Zippy, Mr. Natural, Felix (black and white only), Daffy, Bugs, Pluto, Kilroy, Sherlock, Ahab, Tom, Beowulf (speaks weird English), ex cetera ™, ex cetera ™, to wit the previous and next mental invention of unknown origin;
Not to mention with your Hangnail’s ™ Permission may it Please the Court:
As a consequence of this previously noted, we at the are in the process of developing balanced disaggressions by which a capital cartoon gain affects spending may well be a function of whether or not the gain has been realized. In this wise, a capital cartoon gain is realized and made liquid, with the potential to affect spending, assets, or debt in the sector of imagination and all things that are made up. The capital gain in the process disappears as an element in the Plaintiff’s balance sheet.
Equity extraction through realized imaginary gains creates liquid pretend funds with certain imaginary value. Indeed, a significant proportion of sellers do not purchase another cartoon character. In contrast, extraction of unrealized gains does not reduce the cartoon viewer’s uncertainty about their net worth or their exposure to cartoon market price changes. This suggests that the propensity to spend out of realized imaginary gains is likely to be greater than the propensity to spend out of unrealized, or actual real mammal planet gains.
We have no direct evidence, of which I am aware, on the way that such funds are used. However, typically, these surveys indicate that households allocate so-called cash-outs -- that is, the amount by which a refinanced cartoon or facsimile exceeds the pre-refinanced outstanding debt -- to repayment of nonimaginary debt, acquisition of pretend financial assets, outlays for observational improvement such as comic books and video games, and personal consumption expenditures in roughly equal proportions.
If these survey results are taken at face value and are applied to the case in which the imaginary visual images “change hands”-- as distinct from, say, a simple one-time doodle of some kind -- the amount of personal consumption expenditures generated from realized capital gains on the sale of such images, financed through the cartoon market, represents approximately zero cents on the dollar.
We believe with all our hearts therefore -- Guarantor Joint and several liability jus spatiandi et manendi estoppel sui juris notwithstanding moot, this here stupid mammal Toby should be laughed out of Toonville ™ and LONG LIVE THE FIGHTERS.
Thank you very much indeed.
BOY, CORN DOG
License # 23983095630975307675954094376769393000000000a
Note to Toby ™:
Please feel free to call me if you have any questions. Simply go out on the street outside your office and yell "Corn Dog Boy! Corn Dog Boy!" and I will hear you.
Very truly yours,
[signed] Corn Dog Boy ™
Enclosure
cc: some file somewhere so this does not happen again |
