Small town attorneys
A small town prosecuting attorney called his first witness in a trial to the stand, who was a grand-motherly elderly woman. He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?" She responded, "Why , yes I do know you, Mr. William's. I've known you since you were a young boy. And frankly you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a rising big shot when you haven't brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.
The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?" She again replied, Why, yes I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. I used to baby-sit him and he too, has been a real disappointment to me. He's lazy, bigoted, he has a drinking problem. The man can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different woman. Yes, I know him"
The defense attorney was also surprised and shocked.
At this point , the judge brought the courtroom to silence, called both counselors to the bench and in a very quiet voice said, "If either of you bastards asks her if she knows me, you'll be jailed for contempt." |
