BARDonics (comical interpretation and perspective) Message Board

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Pastimes : BARDonics (comical interpretation and perspective)

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To: Ga Bard who wrote (556)	7/26/1998 10:57:00 PM
From: Binder	of 733

Subject: Windows 98 recall It has come to our attention that a few copies of the Georgia edition of Windows 98 may have accidentally been shipped outside GA. If you have one of the GA editions you may need some help understanding the commands. The GA edition may be recognized by looking at the opening screen. It reads WINDERS 98 with a background picture of General Robert E.Lee, superimposed on a Confederate flag. It is shipped with a Daisy Duke screen saver. Also note the Recycle Bin is labeled Outhouse, My Computer is called This Infernal Contraption, Dial up Networking is called Good Ol' Boys, Control Panel is known as the Dern Dashboard, Hard Drive is referred to as 4 wheel drive,and floppies are them little ole plastic disc thangs. Other features: Instead of a error message you get a winder covered with a garbage bag and duct tape. OK = ats aww-right cancel = hail no reset = awa shoot yes = shore no = Naaaa find = hunt-fer it go to = over yonder back = back yonder help = hep me out here stop = ternit off start = crank it up settings = sittins programs = stuff at does stuff documents = stuff I done done Also note that winders 98 does not recognize capital letters or punctuation marks. Some programs that are exclusive to winders 98 tiperiter...........A word processor colering book.......a graphics program addin mershene......calculator outhouse paper......notepad jupe-box............CD Player iner-net............Microsoft Explorer pichers.............A graphics viewer IRS.................M/S accounting software IRS2................M/S accounting software with hidden files coon dog............American kennel club records fishin..............Bass Anglers Sportsman Society records. NRA.................National Rifle Association shot gun............Remington Arms price list riffel..............Winchester price list pisstel.............Smith & Wesson price list truck...............Ford & Chevrolet dealers in SC by zip code house...............Nearest Mobile home repair service by zip code car.................same as truck just need two list in South Caroline cuzzins.............family history usually a 3 meg file tax records.........usually an empty file shells..............ammunition inventory another 3 meg file bud.................list of Budwiser dealers by zip code rasin.........NASCAR racing schedule includes list of TV stations that carry the race car n truck Parts...nearest Junk yard by zip code doc.................veterinarians by zip code We regret any inconvenience it may have caused if you received a copy of the GA edition.You may return it to Microsoft for a replacement version.

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