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Politics : Just the Facts, Ma'am: A Compendium of Liberal Fiction

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To: longnshort who wrote (8505)	6/3/2004 4:04:40 PM
From: JakeStraw	of 90947

John Kerry: Lifelong Hunter - AND Animal Rightist?? June 3, 2004 by Humberto Fontova "I do a better job of fighting for the rights of sportsmen than George Bush does." That's John Kerry boasting to outdoor writers while visiting New Orleans recently. Recall that last November during the Iowa Caucus, Kerry (with cameras rolling) took to a cornfield with a shotgun and blasted two pheasant. He folded the suckers. BLAM!-BLAM! Two shots. Two dead pheasant. "I've been hunting all my life!" he grinned while hefting the mangled birds. "I love doves too. You just gut 'em and hang for a few days. I love 'em cold roasted." Some think this clinched his victory in Iowa. According to analysts, Gore blew it in 2000 by neglecting rustic voters, by coming across as anti-gun, anti-hunting - thus anti-middle America and elitist. Heck, Gore couldn't even carry his home state of Tennessee! What a dork. Terry McCauliffe and crew said "No Mas!" Never again! Those pheasant paid the price - a little "collateral damage" on the way to a Democratic triumph next fall, let's call it. Animal rightists shut their eyes, grimaced and banged their Hare Krishna finger-cymbals while chanting for Earth Goddess Gaia's reprieve. But they sucked it up manfully. Kerry's still their man.

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