HEY LOOK PEOPLE. NOW WE MADE "COMMUNICATIONS WEEK TOO! SEE *'d ITEM:
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March 03, 1997, Issue: 652
Section: Logout
Hints of Acquisition Float in Spring Air
By
Maybe it was the aftereffects of the stuff they gave me in the hospital.
Maybe it was the false hints of spring in the air. But something was
off-kilter, and there was a feeling like things could never be righted again.
Sorta like after the Moldovan phone charges start rolling in.
It wasn't a hangover; it wasn't the Rod Serling-like glare from my
secretary, Lotta Memory; and it wasn't the atonal choral music blaring
from her desk radio.
"Something's just not right here," I griped to no one in particular. Lotta
stuck her fist in my face, then uncurled her fingers to reveal a dog-eared
business card.
"Mrs. Magda?" I asked, grimacing at the moon-and-star crapola around
the embossed name.
"No crabbing, Sponge-Bath Boy," Lotta said. "This gal has more insight
than a warehouse full of New Jersey consultants."
Half a pack of Camels later, Bandanna-Head was ushering me into her
drape-laden lair. "Come in, Case, I was expecting you," she purred. Mrs.
M swung a small crystal over my head, then laid it next to her crystal ball.
"The omens are strange, like a Larry Ellison tea ceremony," she intoned.
Perhaps emboldened by the 3Com-U.S. Robotics deal, Magda claimed
that Ascend and Cascade were contemplating a similar deal.
"Redundancy, doubled over twice," she cooed.
Magda predicted a different cascade, involving that of AquaPenn Spring
Water Co., a Pennsylvania water bottler, which has diversified into the
ISP business. "EDI, intranets and more!" she said. Uhh boy, make mine
sparkling.
"Does the name Cabletron mean anything to you?" she asked. A boxing
glove hologram suddenly hovered before our eyes. Seems company execs
got the message that their pugilistic ad campaign was less than a
knockout, and they now hope to offer something softer and warmer.
Made me wanna hug Craig Benson, the big lug.
The change may have been fortuitous for Cabletron. "USR had its eye on
acquiring Cabletron before the 3Com deal."
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Then she said that annoyed Novell investors have created Web pages
where they can virtually shoot president Joe Marengi, and worse.
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COMMENT: THIS IS "US" GUYS AND GALS! SEE LAZER! YA' GOTTA BE PERSISTANT!!!! JOE...
"Crystal's gone dark, baby. But your aura looks good as new," she said. I
handed her 50 big ones and ambled back out into the daylight.
Drop Case a line-send him a news tip! E-mail it to ndetect@cmp.com or
call 516-562-7809. If we use your tip, Case will mail you a Net Detective
coffee mug.
Copyright 1997 CMP Media Inc. |
