It Is True My Poll Numbers Are Among The Lowest In History, But Only Because Most Americans Are Now Engaged In Political Posturing
Contributed by Andrew Romano - Posted: May 8, 2007 4:52:54 PM
Don't fret, Dubya. Sure, things aren't going your way. Attorney General Alberto Gonzales does not appear to be the most competent of fellows. The World Bank is about to sack your pal Paul Wolfowitz. Your vice president's former chief of staff, I. Lewis (Scooter) Libby, is probably going to prison. And this little adventure in Iraq has proven more irksome than you'd imagined. Which is why your average approval rating, according to the good people at Pollster.com, is 34.3 percent. In the latest NEWSWEEK Poll, in fact, America has awarded you the lowest individual presidential approval rating since the malaisey days of Jimmy Carter: 28 percent.
But guess what? You've got company down there, big guy. All this time, the "Media" have been going on and on about how being mired in the sub-40 range since mid-2005 puts you in Tricky Dick territory in terms of unrelenting unpopularity. Meanwhile, pollsters like Charles Franklin of the University of Wisconsin (one half of the team behind Pollster.com) warn that if your average numbers "continue to decline at something like the pace of the last couple of years, they'll fall into the 20s by 2008. Bush is easily having among the worst last two years of any president in history." Oh, and small children, like, run screaming whenever they see your face. As if you were the only politician in America despised by more than two thirds of his constituents. The temerity!
To buck you up, we've tracked down three other elected officials right here in America who are equally or even more disapproved of than you. It was arduous, but we managed.
First up: Ernie Fletcher, Republican governor of the good state of Kentucky. If his current rating of 36 percent (up from last month's 32 percent ) is any indication, voters tend not to like it when you're indicted for three misdemeanors--conspiracy, official misconduct and political discrimination--while in office. Go figure. According to a Nov. 16, 2006, grand-jury report, Fletcher allegedly approved "a widespread and coordinated plan," subsequently carried out by "entire departments and cabinets," to illegally replace Democratic state employees with loyal Republicans. (Fletcher pleaded not guilty, and the case was later dropped in exchange for an admission of wrongdoing.) Predictably, Attorney General Gonzales claims to have no knowledge of the firings.
Next in line: Gov. Jim Gibbons, Republican of Nevada, whose approval rating has sunk to a paltry 30 percent since taking office in January. How much can go wrong in a few short weeks? Let's see. You've got a Las Vegas cocktail waitress accusing Gibbons of sexual assault in a parking garage (never proven due to insufficient evidence); the FBI investigating gifts from a friend to whom Gibbons supposedly steered business while in Congress (Gibbons denies any wrongdoing); Gibbons's wife working as a consultant to a company that Gibbons reportedly helped get a federal contract, and, of course, Gibbons telling a reporter that while he couldn't recall his new energy chief's name, he did know that "she's from India"--when, in fact, she's originally from Turkey. India, Turkey; Iraq, Iran--those crazy foreign countries get so confusing sometimes.
And now, finally, the moment you've all been waiting for. The Gaggle's official "Least Approved of Politician in America" is... Philadelphia Mayor John Street! During Street's tenure, the city's murder rate has hit a seven-year high (up to 406 in 2006 from 330 in 2004). In 2003, close friend and fund-raiser Ron White partially took control of city contracting and siphoned funds to Street's re-election campaign. Although White died before going to trial, former city treasurer Cory Kemp was found guilty on 27 corruption charges and sentenced to 10 years in jail. (Other members of the administration await prosecution.) Last--but hardly least--Internet sources reported earlier this year that Street portrayed Bozo the Clown on local television in the late 1980s. Tragically, the reports were erroneous. But, you know, still--not the best PR.
And probably not the best bunch for you to get grouped with, POTUS. Is there anything you can do to leave Fletcher, Gibbons and Street behind? Franklin says no: "Bush is in a bad situation, I'm afraid. He's more like Lyndon Johnson than anyone else. As time goes on, the weight of war is dragging down his approval rating instead of improving it. I'm pessimistic about that changing any time soon." But you should be proud of your lousy numbers, Mr. President. Those other guys won their unpopularity the easy way: corruption, cocktail waitresses and clown suits. You've really earned it.
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