By some strange error in cyberspace, the following fax appeared on my machine this morning.
As the companies mentioned below have been discussed on this thread,
I thought it might be of general interest.
Final report to the CEO of Micron Tech:
After a thorough analysis I have come up with the following
solution of your financial problems:
I suggest a five step solution:
1. To increase the capital base:
Close down all R&D activity
Close down all production facilities
Sell the fabs back to TXN
2. Buy good quality, unbranded DRAMS from SEA
3. Mark them with MU labels
4. Add 30% to the price
5. Sales campaign based on different brand names in different areas:
MUlla in Moslem areas, MUus in Canada, MUulah in the US .
Special custom packaging as MUcus.
Older versions as MUsty.
As your qualified economic advisor, I expect to receive the usual royalty of 1% when the proposed activities have been implemented.
Respectfully,
A. Blochead
Final report to the CEO of Gilette:
After a thorough analysis I have come up with the following
solution of your financial problems:
I suggest a four step solution:
1. Develop a 4-blade razor, which by default must be a 33% improvement over the 3-blade type.
2. The handle will be striped in yellow and black.
New campaign "Put a Tiger in your hand".
3. TV commercials showing animated razors in a circus ring, jumping through rings of fire.
4. The razors will be launched world-wide, using the brand name
"The Fire Ring's Quad"
As your qualified economic advisor, I expect to receive the usual royalty of 1% when the proposed activities have been implemented.
Respectfully
A. Blochead
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