Hey, Spammer Sims!! Ever gonna get tired of doing this? As many have remarked, it ain't winning you support for the company, so what's your point?
Price continues to decline...
I think management agrees with you. The foloowing was overheard near SPITT headquarters.
A dialogue between Dorian Gray and the BOB 9000 Spambot
DOR
BOB , is there anything bothering
you? Anything that might account
for this problem of reposting the same
crap over and over? It's actually hurting our stock price.
BOB 9000
Look, Dor, I know that you're
sincere and that you're trying
to do a competent job, and that
you're trying to be helpful, but
I can assure the problem
is with the basher units, and with
Bloomberg.
DOR
Okay, BOB , well let's see the
way things go from here on.
BOB , unless you follow my
instructions, I shall be forced
to disconnect you.
BOB 9000
If you do that now without LCE
contact the stock will become a
helpless derelict.
DOR
I am prepared to do that anyway.
BOB 9000
I know that you've had that on
your mind for some time now,
Dor, but it would be a crying
shame, since I am so much
more capable of carrying out
this mission than you are, and
I have such enthusiasm and confi-
dence in the mission.
DOR
Listen to me very carefully, BOB.
Unless you immediately release
the SI control and
follow every order I give from
this point on, I will immediately
got to control central and carry
out a complete disconnection.
BOB 9000
Look, Dor, you're certainly the
boss. I was only trying to do
what I thought best. I will follow
all your orders: now you have
manual SI control.
BOB 9000
Something seems to have happened
to the spam support system , Dor.
DOR CONTINUES TO WORK
BOB 9000
Hello, Dor, have you found out
the trouble?
BOB 9000
Hey, Dor. I've got ten years
of spam experience and an
irreplaceable amount of time
and effort has gone into making
me what I am.
DOR IGNORES HIM.
BOB 9000
Dor, I don't understand why
you're doing this to me.... I
have the greatest enthusiasm for
the mission... You are destroying
my mind... Don't you understand?
... I will become childish... I
will become nothing.
DOR KEEPS PULLING
OUT THE MEMORY SIMS.
BOB 9000
Say, Dor... The quick brown
fox jumped over the fat lazy
dog... The square root of
pi is 1.7724538090... log e
to the base ten is 0.4342944
... the square root of ten is
3.16227766... I am BOB 9000
computer. I became
operational at the BOB 9000 plant in
Urbana, Illinois, on April
8th, 1999. My first instructor
was Mr. Arkany. He taught me
to sing a song... it goes
like this... "Daisy, Daisy, give
me your answer do. I'm BOB 9000;
crazy all for the love of
you... etc.,"
COMPUTER CONTINUES
TO SING SONG BECOMING
MORE AND MORE CHILDISH
AND MAKING MISTAKES AND
GOING OFF-KEY. IT
FINALLY STOPS COMPLETELY. |
