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Pastimes : The Naked Truth - Big Kahuna a Myth
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To: MythMan who wrote (60891)9/8/1999 6:00:00 PM
From: Les H  Read Replies (1) of 86076
 
Gore Asks Clinton to Grant Clemency to Timothy McVeigh

WASHINGTON, DC - Jealous of the President's willingness to help his wife's Senate campaign by releasing Puerto Rican terrorists, Vice President Al Gore has asked Clinton to help him by releasing Oklahoma City bomber, Timothy McVeigh. The request comes after a new BNN/Newsmonth Poll revealed that Al Gore's approval rating among 'Militia Men' has dropped to an all time low.

According to the poll, the Vice President's current approval rating among 'Militia Men' is hovering around 1%. This is down from 1.4% in June. When BNN asked one 'Militia Man' if he would rather vote for Al Gore or give up his 2nd ammendment rights he angrily answered, "A vote for Gore is a vote against the 2nd Amendment."

Gore's campaign team is concerned about his unpopularity among 'Militia Men'. Said one Gore advisor, "We are hoping that Clinton will offer clemency to McVeigh so that the Vice President can rebuild his image among this important block of voters."

Critics of the clemency plan argue that McVeigh is a threat to public safety and ought to be executed as planned. Gore responded to this criticism by saying, "McVeigh isn't anymore dangerous than the 15 Puerto Ricans that the President has already offered clemency. Besides, I am already promising the Arab-American community that if I am elected I will put Osama bin Laden in charge of our nuclear arsenal."
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