Interesting article. I agree with the comments already made on the effectiveness of training Indonesian officers in the West, but I also have some problems with this one:
What, then, should the U.S. do? The wisest course would be to throw our moral support and military weight behind the regional power that has followed Indonesia most closely, and with which we have the closest relations--Australia. While we may not supply ground troops for an intervention force in East Timor, the Australians might, and American logistical, communications and intelligence support would surely help them. Indeed, we should encourage Australia to take the lead in formulating a policy to cope with an Indonesia that might find itself in even worse turmoil than we now see.
The idea of an Aussie-led peacekeeping force gives me major worries. Any peacekeeping force is going to have to cope with a concurrent ABRI presence. There is going to be very real friction, and my guess is that it wouldn't take much for shooting to flare up, especially if a bunch of thoroughly kasar white boys are throwing their weight around. I would much rather see troops drawn from Asian countries, with logistic support from the US and Australia and a substantial contingent of unarmed UN observers.
The initial peacekeeping force will probably have to be Australian, but the faster they get out of there the better, for everybody.
Australia's stake in the Timor Gap oil field, and the possible ulterior motive it presents, also raises questions about the appropriateness of letting Australia take the lead on formulating policy toward Indonesia.
Last, this was on the Laughter thread; I don't know how true it is, but I got a good laugh out of it.
To: The Indonesian Foreign Minister
From: The Australian Prime Minister
My Dear Dr Alatas,
May I thank you, on behalf of the Australian people, for your country's most kind declaration of war, received in my office at 8pm last night. With sincere regret, I must decline your invitation to fight. If you could delay your invasion of our northern coastline until, say, 2015, I'm sure we'd be able to give you a terrific scrap.
But at the moment I doubt we could even field a team. Our F-111s are grounded again, and, because of their age (ours have the gearshift on the steering column, and those indicators that flip out of the door pillars), spare parts are available only at wrecking yards and swap meets. Also, we just can't seem to get them to run properly on unleaded. The Chinooks in Townsville are grounded, too. Losing the choppers is bad news as our fixed-wing capacity in the north is presently in tatters. Why? A slight kerfuffle over my good friend Warren Entsch's concreting business has left our RAAF base at Weipa short of a number of desirable features - like a runway.
Our Defence Minister, Mr. Moore, sends his apologies, but insists that a war is presently out of the question as we don't have a Defense Secretary. Well we have one, but he's currently trying to wrestle Mr. Moore to death in the Federal Court, for wrongful dismissal. It would be a little unfair on Mr. Moore to begin a war while nobody in the Defence Department will speak to him.
You will probably know that the Chief of Navy isn't getting a new contract either but, even if he was, I could not possibly commit our senior service to any conflict. Our two Collins submarines, "Drowning" and 'Waving', have just returned from sea trials off Fiji to assess their design targets of silence and stealth. Every time they went into
reverse, normal conversation became impossible across most of Chile and Peru. It is also disheartening that Drowning ran aground, especially as this mishap somehow snapped off her periscope. Think
about it!
Not that we have enough submariners to man the boats anyway. Attracting career sailors to our modern professional navy has not been helped by recent revelations on prime time television that recruits are routinely stripped naked, smeared with food scraps and excrement, and flogged on the buttocks. I take no comfort from the flood of applications this publicity drew from Tasmania.
The army is still the bulwark of Australia's security, but even there things are difficult. Changes following the Women In Combatreport, and same-sex relationship rulings, have, in my opinion compromised our flexibility. For example, both the First Heavy Armored (Dykes With Pykes) and the Gay Fusiliers (The Queens Light Foot) refuse to fight for a fortnight either side of the Sydney Mardi Gras.
Other soldiers are insisting, these days, on owning the conflict and have begun to enroll in regular workshops to manage their aggression. High Court rulings may also mean, with no offence Dr. Alatas, that we cannot engage in a battle against a racially-selected enemy force. Can you recruit a sprinkling of Europeans next time? By all means take as many of ours as you want.
It is a good indication of the quality of our Defense Intelligence Organisation that I am unable to send this transmission in code. The code books were stolen by an unstable, steroid abuser, Jean-Phillippe
Wispelaere, shrewdly recruited by the DIO, and entrusted with most of our defense secrets. So now we don't have any. Mr. Wispelaere sold them all in Bangkok. If you have any secrets you don't need any more,
we would be most grateful for them. I should have the code books back
soon. Christies are auctioning them in Havana next week. In the meantime, DIO suggests we do the old a=b, b=c, c=d code. They swear by
it.
I know our refusal will be a considerable disappointment to you, but can I suggest that you consider invading New Zealand instead? Their only significant defense capability lies with their two Anzac-class frigates, 'Mulk' and 'Lemb'. I have no doubt you'll cream them, and I should know. They were both built in Australia.
Best wishes,
John Howard |
