We have a mutual friend who mentioned your plight...
You said:
"I can't tell them how much I miss them -- it would make things worse for them. So I'll tell you."
I always say the wrong thing, so let me get that out of the way first:
Hey man....get over it!!!
(just kidding ya know!)
There....moving right along. You mentioned being self-employed. Why don't you get out of the house for a while?
That's what I do when I can't deal with emotional torment.
I find that very often even a slight change in surroundings can break a particularly devastating mood. I don't view it as escape, I view it as looking at things from a different vantage point.
My son is now 10, I get very sad sometimes when I see a toddler in a store or something. I think back to when he was that age, and how different things are now. I am guessing you experienced this sort of thing many times yourself....this is no different. The finality of the physical move may be real, but every other aspect of it is the same....it is the advance of time and another stage of your lives has begun.
Life is a relentless push into the future. We try to prepare ourselves for every event, so that next time by-god we can get it right. Emotional stuff doesn't work like that though....you feel, you hurt, you laugh, you can almost see your capacity to feel about to break you apart.
Then, something happens, it always does, that allows you to see things as a progression of events that have not broken you, but made you stronger and increased your ability to give....
Congratulations on having done such a good job as a parent. I'm sure this hurts like hell, you are farther down that road than I, and my thoughts are with you.
Thank you for reminding me how quickly all of these things happen. |
