Supersized, I presume. <g>
Def, in case you're not a subscriber to TheStreet.com, I thought you might enjoy their resident economists' recent comments. (I usually don't copy stuff from their site because I believe they should be paid for it, but it's a bit old and perhaps it will entice a few readers to subscribe.) BTW, I have no financial interest in TSC.
COMMENTARY >> THE INVISIBLE MOUTH
Rushin' to Do a Little Lending
By James Padinha
Economics Correspondent
9/22/99 3:01 PM ET
The (Happy Happy Joy) Joy Luck Club
JACKSON HOLE, Wyo. -- The nugget below appeared on a wire yesterday.
New York Federal Reserve Bank President William McDonough reiterated the Fed's stance that it is prepared to enhance liquidity in the run-up to Y2K. McDonough repeated that starting Oct. 1, the Fed will implement a "no questions asked" policy at the discount window.
How ... cheeky.
Really. Can you even imagine?
To Russi... No. Wait. To Springfield. With Love.
Interior. Daylight. A discount window somewhere on the East Coast.
A young, sharp-dressed, sunglassed woman approaches a Nice Fed Lady behind the cage.
Nice Fed Lady [perky]: Morning! How can I help you?
Young Woman [removing sunglasses]: Hi. I'd like to borrow some money under the No Questions Asked policy.
NFL [perkier still]: Very good! Can I please have [reaching for small yellow Post-it] your name?
YW [putting glasses back on and pointing overhead]: The banner there says No Questions Asked.
NFL [smiling, nodding]: Yes ma'am! We wrote it that way [cocking head slightly, crinkling nose, hunching shoulders] to make sure that no one would be afraid to come in and ask for funds!
NFL [still smiling]: There are actually four questions I need to ask. All [glancing down at Post-it] short ones! Name?
YW [hesitant]: Natasha Gurfinkel Kagalo... no. Wait. Lucy Edwa... no. Wait. Svetlana Kudryav... no. Wait. Tatyana Yelt... no. Wait. Simpson. Lisa. Da. I mean Yes. Lisa Simpson. Yes.
NFL [scribbling]: Very good! Firm?
YW [pausing]: The Bank of New Yo... no. Wait. Menate... no. Wait. Bene... no. Wait. Springfield Nuclear. Yes. Springfield Nuclear.
NFL [scribbling]: Very good! Amount of loan? In billions?
YW [immediately]: Four-point-tw... no. Wait [bringing finger to temple, tapping]. Eight-point-four. Yes. Eight-point-four billion dollars.
NFL [scribbling]: Very good! Purpose of loan?
YW [thinking]: Writing down laundering losse... no. Wait. Congressional payof... no. Wait. Upgrades. Yes. Power-plant upgrades.
NFL [scribbling]: Very good! [Swinging around to pass Post-it to green-visored clerk behind her, turning back to woman] Your loan will be ready [pointing toward sign that reads Pick Up Here] at the far end of the counter in a few minutes. Meantime please relax [pointing toward lush lobby] in our waiting area. Tinkling the small silver bell will bring [cocking head, crinkling nose] a butler with tea service!
YW [unimpressed]: Thank you. [Thinking] Do you by chance know of anyone else who extends loans like this?
NFL [beaming]: Yes ma'am! That would be the IMF! It's just three blocks down. Or [pointing toward a door stamped In Case of Extreme Emergency Only] feel free to use our tunnel!
YW [grinning]: Thank you.
NFL [suddenly remembering something]: And oh! Miss Simpson?!
YW [turning, holding breath, concerned]: Yes?
NFL [excited]: I just love the scent you're wearing! And it seems to be all the rage with the young women these days -- I smell it on nearly everyone who comes in here! Do you mind terribly revealing the name of it?
YW [exhaling, relieved]: Of course not.
YW: It's called Stoli.
Roger and Me
Firms are not raising prices but rather are meeting increased demand with more efficient production.
Thus Fed Governor Ferguson yesterday.
And one wonders.
Why weren't firms producing as efficiently as they could in the first place?
The way many folks talk about productivity these days, one could be excused for coming to the conclusion that firms have ever at the ready a big bucket of neater and newer tools and gadgets and processes -- one from which, whenever they run into some fresh overseas competition or consumers who decide on a whim that damnit-we-just-don't-feel-like-paying-more-anymore, they can pluck to produce a little productivity boost at will.
And that's just really hard to swallow.
I get too many notes from too many managers to argue that productivity growth isn't accelerating smartly in certain areas.
It most certainly is.
But the bucket-dipping notion? That the option to just suddenly jack up productivity however much they need to in order to counter production or cost problems is always available to firms?
Uh-uh. No go.
That just don't sit right. |
