I received this E-Mail this morning, and thought Techriders might enjoy it:
The Empire Strikes Back: Revised Scene
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INT: CLOUD CITY, BESPIN GANTRY
A furious lightsaber duel is underway. DARTH VADER is backing LUKE
SKYWALKER towards the end of the gantry. A quick Errol Flynn move
by Vader, and Luke's hand goes spinning off into the ventilation
shaft! Luke cries out, holding his stub arm. He backs away, looks
around, but realizes there's nowhere to go but straight down.
Darth Vader: Obi Wan never told you what happened to your father.
Luke: He told me enough! He told me you killed him!
Vader: No... I am your father!
Luke: No!!! I's not true! It's impossible.
Vader: Search your feelings ... you know it to be true ...
Luke: (in tears) NOOOOOO!
Vader: Yes, it is true ... and you know what else? You know
that brass droid of yours?
Luke: Threepio?
Vader: Yeah, Threepio. I built him - when I was 7 years old.
Luke: No wonder he's such a pain in the neck!
Vader: Seven years old! And what have you done? Look at
yourself, no hand, no job, and couldn't even levitate
your own ship out of the swamp ...
Luke: I destroyed your precious Death Star!
Vader: When you were, what, 20! When I was 10, I single-
handedly destroyed a shielded Trade Federation Droid
Control ship ... with a lucky shot!
Luke: Well, I used to bulls-eye womp rats in my T-16 racing
through Beggar's Canyon...
Vader: Oh, for the love of the Emperor! Ten years old, winner
of the Boonta Eve Open, only human to ever fly a Pod
Racer ... right here, baby!
Luke: (looking dejected) But, but, it's not my fault ...
Vader: Oh! Here we go ... <whining> "Poor me! My father never
gave me what I wanted for my birthday ... Boo-Hoo ... My
daddy's the Dark Lord of the Sith ... Waahhh! Waahhh!"
Luke: (stammering) Shut up! Shut UP!!!
Vader: You're a slacker! You think *I* had a Dad there for
*me*? Ha! *I* was conceived by the mitochondrians and
raised by my mother in slavery! But by the time I was
your age, I had exterminated the Jedi knights!
Luke looks down the shaft. Takes a step towards it.
Vader: I was wrong ... You know what? You're not my kid! You're
not good enough to be my kid!
Luke, in tears, takes a step off the platform, hesitates, then
plunges down the shaft. Darth Vader looks after him ...
Vader: And get a haircut! <Pfffft!>
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