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Pastimes : Happy Hour: A thread for not so intelligent discussions

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To: Susie924 who wrote (1731)	10/11/1999 10:54:00 AM
From: Barney	of 2380

1. Q. What do you call a virgin on a waterbed.????? A. A cherry float. 2. Q. What did the sign on the door of the whorehouse say? A. Beat IT - we're closed. 3. Q. Why do walruses go to Tupperware parties? A. To find a tight seal. 4. A. Incontinence Hotline... Q. Can you hold, please? 5. Q. What do you do with 365 used rubbers? A. Melt them down, make a tire, and call it a Goodyear. 6. Q. What's the difference between sin and shame? A. It is a sin to put it in, but it's a shame to pull it out. 7. Q. What's the speed limit of sex? A. 68; at 69 you have to turn around. 8. Q. What's the ultimate rejection? A. When you're masturbating and your hand falls asleep. 9. Q. Why did Raggedy Ann get thrown out of the toy box? A. She kept sitting on Pinocchio's face, and moaning, "Lie to me!" 10.Q. Why is air a lot like sex? A. Because it's no big deal unless you're not getting any. 11.Q. If there is H2O on the inside of a fire hydrant, what is on the outside? A. K9P. 12.Q. What's another name for pickled bread? A. Dill-dough 13.Q. Why did Frosty the Snowman pull down his pants? A. He heard the snow blower coming. 14.Q: Why are Monica Lewinsky's cheeks so puffy? A: She's withholding evidence 15.Q. What's the difference between light and hard? A. You can sleep with a light on. 16.Q. Why do women rub their eyes when they get out of bed? A. Because they don't have balls to scratch. 17.Q. Why is sex like a bridge game? A. You don't need a partner if you have a good hand. 18.Q. What's the definition of mixed emotions? A. When you see your mother-in-law backing off a cliff in your new car. 19.Q. What's the height of conceit? A. Having an orgasm and calling out your own name. 20.Q. What's the definition of macho? A. Jogging home from your own vasectomy. 21.Q. What do a Christmas tree and a priest have in common? A. Their balls are just for decoration. 22.Q. Why don't blind people like to sky dive? A. Because it scares the hell out of the dog. 23.Q. How do you double the value of a Yugo? A. You fill it with gas. 24.Q. What's the difference between a lawyer and God? A. God doesn't think he's a lawyer. 25.Q. Why is divorce so expensive? A. Because it's worth it.

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