HowDEE Jed, nice 2CU @ SAM MANELLA'S MEAT MARKET agin, shoppin' fer grosrees an who noze whut else. Whutchew gotin yer cart today? Hmm yum, demdar late lil bitty StrawbRees luks espeSholee gud, ahl go git me sum 2. Lookidis hyar punkin pie Sattidy BakrE speshL wit da crust made frum wheat flowr & Pcans it luks reel gud an its upta 9 dollars now but its free witda coopon! So dis nis Powder hypo-allRgenik bleech altRnativ Dturgint iza gud deal now. Gets da clodes cleen, smells gud, duzzint leev a resOdoo like sum udder wuns do an it duzzint Boost CapacOtees. But its mor Xpensiv dendat good ole Ivry Liquid, best nonkemikals dere is fer SensOtiv skin an ShrinkOtiv tendonC coldwaterwash clodes.
Jest B carful squirtdat Ivry Liquid out wenyer on marjin inda washin masheen 2 da slow count of OneOneThousand for med. size cold wash & no mor dendat or it'll givya 2 manee suds 2 tax yer masheen wit atdis tine of yeer, 10-4?
4A hot solid wash lak Brandname 909 towels ah liketa stay saf an useda solid powdir.
AnEEway, much Oblijd 2U 4 demdar instruckshuns on how 2B gettin' away aleEun ABduckshuns ef dey cum 2 call. Wondrin howcum U tink indat nooz link, what4 wud an off-S mgr. downtown (n/o Joan kwinkydinker) sed "as a shareowner, i resent the inefficiency" ov demdar missing nams? Duz dat meen ah hafta call sum CEOs an speekup, cuz ahm holtin shars in sum BabyBell Compnees R 2 dat maks fone diwrecktREs 2? Whutif dey R unlistid nams, whut den?
Cuz aleEuns hav nevir givn me a raisin 2B afrade uvem ahm not, but ah will add yer alEun rEpLnts an abduckshun survivlkit items 2 mah shoppinlist hyar whilimatit Jed, jest in case. Much Oblijd 2U fer givinit. Ah dunno how 2 git an keep dat skunkPUstuff clos around tho, so fer now ahl havta go wit a big can of hairspray closeby til ah kin figgerout how to manij dat skunkPUstuf. "Run Like Hell" woodBit, an failindat ah wood try 2 "Charm 'Em" "Talk 'Em Out Of It" by "LoosenUp & LOL". Ah gota feelin sum good ole Yankee-injenUiT ROFL's wud be hitinem by Surprize, mite givusa chance 2 mak a Getaway.
Jest thot of wun - whutif demdar alEuns hav me marchin to dere ship? Ah mite say "C'mon in, set a spell, take yer shoes off! Ahm lookin forwirt 2C yer spaceship, tanks 4 the Invite! But first let's hav a cigrit an a drink hyar B4 we go! Hyar's suma DickDales music on hyar, U'll lak it. Siddown rite over dere, sure u kin grubsum cigrits! Wud U lak an orange creme soda, an ice cream soda, froot joos, v-8, a coke, a cup of coffee, ice tea, a glass of wine, a beer, a shot of whiskey, or a Pina Colada? Ahv got sum nuts an chips an cookies an CHEESE 4U2!! (deyr spozta go craZ 4 datdere cheez), RU hongree? Lemme show U dem all an U kin decide! Wood U lak 2C mah Elvis ImpRsunashuns? Ahl do 'em ez soon ez ah git R drinks an snaks togedder. Inda meentime lookit mah funEE IntRnet Bookmarks makesya ROFL ... yadda yadda...". Sumpin tells me dat mite work eza aleUn distrackshun, Jed!! Cuz ifit duzzint, den dat mite B da last chans if anudder oppRuniT duzzint prEsnt itsef.
Its gud we hav sum smart animules 2 warnusbout trSpassRs comin onda propRT 2. R cat TigRlily still izzint muchofa WS gal, but she duz tellus wen sumwun R sum animule cums close 2 R house evrEtine sofar. Shes doin a gud job Spesholee fer a lil 1 year cat.
Good 2CU ez alwaze, Jed. Hava Gr8 Day! We'uns R goin ovir 2 NYC an wandrin aroun da window shops agin on dis ByooTful warm day in late autumn! C U Laytar!
yor longtine frend, Joan |
