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Pastimes : FLAME THREAD - Post all obnoxious/derogatory comments here
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To: bluejeans who wrote (7793)12/6/1999 10:22:00 AM
From: Solon  Read Replies (3) of 12754
 
It gives me immense pleasure to send you the gift of an early Christmas present--a well worn and beautiful pair of dungarees! You will find them (thoughtfully) pre-stained and soiled so as to provide the maximum in wearing pleasure. I have dyed them a yellow brown hoping you would find this more pleasing than a drab blue.

As for your blue jeans, bluejean...I suggest you gift them to Lee (the hick). It is well known that Lee invented blue jeans in 1927...long before you were kicking rocks and scuffing the toes of your tiny boots.

When you came to this thread, I noticed immediately that you had absolutely no class. This rather endeared you to me, and I even began to hope that you might perhaps be a woman. Do not be surprised if you start receiving sweet nothings from Sherry. She sends me little messages all the time. Unfortunately, I discovered she had the annoying habit of washing her hair in the morning and brushing her tooth. This was a turn-off to me. Understandably, I was loath to endure such abhorrent behavior for the mere reward of beauty.

Your previous remarks indicate to me that you are a gourmand. I hope that size 46 will be fitting for your dungarees. I took the liberty, in any case, of removing the button, in consideration of your comfort.

I apologize for not sending you a drink, but all I have left here is this store bought crap! I hope you are sitting pretty, and I give you CHEERS!

I dub thee, SIR DUNGAREE, KING OF FASHION, and I remain, your most humble master...

Solon of Athens
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