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Pastimes : Let's Talk About Our Feelings!!!
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To: Ish who wrote (66132)12/12/1999 1:05:00 PM
From: Edwarda  Read Replies (1) of 108807
 
What bothers me about this whole discussion is that there seems to be no recognition of the continuum of correction and discipline. To say that it is acceptable to give a swift swat on the hand or the behind to a small child who persists in trying to pull something hot off the stove after all other measures fail is not to advocate beating children, for pity's sake! When physical punishment is employed very rarely, the very surprise value is what makes it so effective in that it conveys that this is a serious matter.

I should also like to emphasize that one can do as much harm verbally as one can with a leather strap. It has been stated here before; I want to add my voice.

Moreover, one of the most important things to bear in mind when considering how to handle issues of correction and punishment, IMO, is to avoid humiliation--regardless of the means employed. Slapping a child in the face, for example, humiliates the child; I suspect that the humiliation, whether verbal or physical, is what scars the psyche.

Punishing a child in anger rather than out of concern for the child's safety or moral well-being is also dangerous, since it is more likely that the punishment will be physical when it is not necessary to resort to physical punishment. I have found myself in deep admiration of parents visibly restraining themselves from giving way to anger at a four-year-old who "acting out" and rather trying to correct appropriately.

In sum, I do not see how the question of corporal punishment can be settled with a brisk "Never" or "Of course." It is far more complex than either response allows.
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