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Pastimes : Happy Hour: A thread for not so intelligent discussions
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To: Susie924 who wrote (2044)12/20/1999 10:06:00 AM
From: Barney  Read Replies (1) of 2380
 
Things to do at Walmart while the spouse is taking her sweet time
Christmas shopping.

1. Get the boxes of condoms & randomly put them in peoples carts when they are not looking.

2. Set all the alarm clocks to go off at 10 minute intervals.

3. Make a trail of orange juice on the floor to the restrooms.

4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, "I
think we have a code 3 in housewares," and see what happens.

5. Turn all the radios to a polka station, then turn them all off
and turn the volumes to 10.

6. Challenge other customers to duel with tubes of gift wrap.

7. Put M&M's on layaway.

8. Move "CAUTION_WET FLOOR" signs to carpet areas.

9. Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you'll only
invite them if they bring pillows from the bedding department.

10. When someone asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask
"Why won't you people leave me alone?".

11. Look right into the security camera and use it as a mirror
while you pick your nose.

12. Take up an entire aisle in toys by setting up a full scale
battlefield with G.I.Joes and X_Men.

13. Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.

14. While handling guns in the hunting department ask the clerk if
he knows where the anti-depressants are.

15. Switch signs on the men's and women's bathrooms.

16. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from "Mission
Impossible".

17. Set up a "Valet Parking" sign out front.

18. In the auto department practice your Madonna look using
different size funnels.

19. Hide in the clothing rack and when people browse through say
"PICK ME! PICK ME!!!!!!".

20. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker assume the
fetal position an scream "NO!NO! It's those voices again".

21. Go to the food court, get a soft drink, tell them you don't get
out much and would they put one of those little umbrellas in it.

22. Go into the fitting room and yell real loud ...."Hey we're out
of toilet paper in here!".
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