I heard about people who had birthdays near Cmas when I was about in third grade, a sort of seminal year (is that the right word? I mean ~ "seminal"?) ~ I realize most of the time, maybe all of the time I think about (remember) that time, I remember various locations in and around my elementary school. The Auditorium; The Playground; The Cafeteria Across The Street Led Over There In Lines Sometimes With Yellow Raincoats, Some Kids Had Yellow Raincoats And The Line Was Long Enough That You Would See Them Ahead Of You In Turns Like The Cars Of A Train, And Lunch Was 35 cents, 1.05 For Three Days.
I think you could pay for three days at a time, but then you had papers not to lose (they start roping you in to civilization early) ~ wait, nevermind, I heard about the kids who had birthdays in December, and I remembered it on and off for about three weeks, and I felt very bad.
I was, also, duh, glad that wasn't me. I would be even madder.
But just for me, even, I thought it was tragic. Literally on the scale as tragic. Born on Cmas Day seemed kind of cool, I mean I figured someone must be, because they couldn't prevent it, I don't think ~ but born after Cmas in December? Or the 24th? You are screwed.
You are INSIGNIFICANT.
Literally.
How do you like THEM apples?
How do you like your Jesus now?
Creepers.
It's pretty annoying, is what it is. I can see myself eight years later saying, "What has Jesus ever done for me?
I think it could crimp your attitude. Maybe not yours, but mine. I'm a practical person. Well, I'm sure you're practical too, but I meant me.
I don't want to understand "exceptions". I want my stuff.
"God-dam baby Jesus."
What about baby Paul?
Consequently, they put my birthday almost exactly six months opposite, just to be safe for the world. Or we would speak of "Paul the Cynic." Maybe we do, but it would be worse.
It's funny (peculiar) how I can still think exactly like that third grader.
Hmmm.
The stairs, the snack shed, the bicycles rack, the diamonds, foursquare, tetherball, Principal's Office.
I had a box of nickels. I liked nickels. I sometimes carried nickels around with me. I asked a lady at our bank if she liked nickels, and she said "My little girl likes dimes. They amaze her, because she doesn't understand them. They don't fit in with the other coins."
See, find an adult you can talk with in Third Grade Language. |
