Dear Levy, once Chutzpah and I were teammates, much like the mythical Weinke and Warrick. Armed with the assurance that I could not fail any test with Chutzpah at my side, I entered the U. S. Open Chutzpah Championship. Alas, today I am a broken man, a victim of cruel fate. With victory in my jaws along came an unknown challenger, whose example of Trust and True Friendship, A New Paradigm, claimed the crown. Yes, my friend, I lost to Linda Tripp. Oh, the sting of shame.
Now you know the real reason why I am unable to attend the meeting in New York. I could have relied on the lame excuse that I left New York when a rascal named O'Malley removed the Dodgers from Brooklyn and that my domicile now is in Virginia and that, as I write, I am vacationing in Florida, but I knew this excuse would not fly.
Oh, yes, the alias silver soldier--that is a sadder tale for another day.
So, much as he may need me, I must decline your well intentioned request that I stand by his side and assist Russ at the meeting. I am certain you and he will understand and forgive.
Sy.
P.S. You really must read some of Max Schulman's works. His first is entitled "Barefoot Boy With Cheek." |
