Mark,
All I'm saying is, if CNBC wants cheerleaders on the NYSE floor, at least get someone entertaining down there.
Ok, a constructive suggestion...here we go...CNBC, I hope you're taking notes, this is a perfect co-branding/co-marketing deal...call Lorne Michaels (SNL Producer) at your sister network NBC, ask him to "borrow" Will Ferrell and Cheri Oteri, the two SNL actors who play the wannabe cheerleaders in the recurring Saturday Night Live skits. Have them tutor Maria for a few weeks. As well, get the SNL writers to insert a little comedy into Maria's daily schtick. That would make it entertaining for us ALL. I can see the new-and-improved Maria, in cheerleading attire, now:
"DOWN-grade! DOWN-grade! Your stock's gonna FALL! SELL SELL SELL before the margin CALL!"
"POUND the table, POUND the table, make the stock ROCK! Gotta get it over my strike price be-fore 4 o'-CLOCK!!!"
"Triple wit-ching, triple-witching makes me GLAD,
out-of-the-money options will be SAD,
once Morgan Stanley puts the words in my MOUTH,
your options will SOON be going SOUTH!"
"Two-four-six-eight, your stocks are down but I make you masterbate!"
Of course, it goes without saying that I am not being nasty, rather, if I was indeed being nasty, that is what I would suggest. |
