Conversation "overheard" between Jim Bob Moffett and David Walsh:
JBM: Thanks for seeing me, David. What a mess, huh?
DW: [Takes a slug of Johnnie Walker Black] Well, Jimmy, I warned you a long time ago to listen to Felderhof and follow his guidance - he knows the area like the back of his hand.
JBM: I know, I know. Problem was we had this kid on the payroll who had degrees up the kazoo and thought he knew more than the old-timers. When he said "Insignificant gold" I listened because, well, you know what it's like in Indo. Thought you were playing the same game. Besides that, the jerk leaks the news to the local press before I had a chance to have someone else review the results and, uh, the rest is history. Needless to say, this prima donna, whiz kid is no longer on the payroll.
DW: [Lights up another un-filtered Camel] I suppose you're here because of the Strathcona leak?
JBM: Yeah. What are we gonna do?
DW: Hmmm, "We?" Yeah, I guess it is "we", partner. Don't wanna rub any more salt into your wounds (pardon the pun), but I have to remind you that a lot of people have been hurt by that "insignificant" statement - personal bankrupcies, suicides, shattered reputations - we're gonna have to attempt to make some good come outta this. Everybody knows that you and Freeport have deep pockets - I hear you're doin' about $33 mil a year - so the ambulance chasers are gonna be all over you. Not to mention the "distinguished" Canadian and American press! They're gonna go after you 'cause you made 'em look like bigger jerks than they already are.
JBM: Ok, ok, enough already! Don't you think I know all that?
DW: [Takes a slug of Jack Daniels] Awright, you fired this jerk geologist, right? You, and no one else in Freeport, made the "insignificant" statement, right? Some over-zealous reporter from the local rag printed the remark before you had a chance to correct it, right?
JBM: Yeah, yeah, yeah. So what's your point?
DW: First, I suggest that you just shut your mouth until Strathcona announces the results. Second, to attempt to help out those people that were hurt by all this, I suggest that we set up a fund to handle any legitimate cases. I think that President S. would agree with that - he's trying to move up a couple of notches on the "most-corrupt-country" list.
JBM: Sounds, ok, but what do I tell my shareholders at today's meeting?
DW: How many tests were done on the samples?
JBM: Three.
DW: What were the results (as if I didn't know)?
JBM: Variable.
DW: [Takes a shot of Smirnoff] Sounds "inconclusive" to me. Wink, wink. Nudge, nudge.
JBM: Brilliant! Thanks 71 million David!
DW: Don't mention it, partner.
JBM: [Leaving] Oh, by the way, did this guy de Guzman really commit suicide?
DW: [Lights up a cigar] Let's put it this way: How many wives do you have?
JBM: Huh? One, of course.
DW: This guy had 4 or 5. 'Nuf said?
Jay
ps: John Stokes, there is definitely a job for you at Freeport - great work! |
