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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke

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To: E who wrote (14071)4/13/2000 12:27:00 AM
From: Barney  Read Replies (2) of 62549
 
Subject: Fwd: Only in America

1. Only in America......
can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

2. Only in America......
are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.

3. Only in America......
do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back
of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy
people can buy cigarettes at the front.

4. Only in America......
do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries,
and a diet coke.

5. Only in America......
do banks leave both doors open and then chain the
pens to the counters.

6. Only in America......
do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the
driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.

7. Only in America......
do we use answering machines to screen calls and then
have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone
we didn't want to talk to in the first place.

8. Only in America......
do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns
in packages of eight.

9. Only in America......
do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so
well: 'Poll' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning
'bloodsucking creatures'.

10. Only in America......
do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.

11. Only in America......
does it take less time to purchase a gun, than to
fill out the paperwork in the hospital when you get
shot by one.
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