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Pastimes : Don't Ask Rambi
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To: George S. Montgomery who wrote (53673)7/22/2000 5:38:12 PM
From: epicure  Read Replies (2) of 71178
 
GSM
As a person well aware of the science of conflict and the escalation of conflict I wonder why you show us this series. Surely even you must be aware that you provoked these women and then escalated the conflict- what you did was warfare, which I suppose is a type of communication but not one which generally leads to snuggles. I do it all the time myself with people- but I do it on purpose. I like to see "What Lies Beneath". But it's no way to win friends and influence people. If you want a honey you must put out some honey. You really can't even catch flies with vinegar.

I don't know if you are really trying to reach out. I would have assumed you just enjoyed bugging people, if you didn't appear so confused by the reactions to your messages I would still assume that.

If you are trying to reach out you must flatter, be interesting and be nice. It's the only way to make friends. If necessary create a persona and PRETEND to be like people who are successful with other people- eventually it will feel more natural to you. People don't want to be poked with a sharp stick. Well a very few people do- but they are masochists, and they are a fairly pathetic lot with real self esteem issues (just my opinion- I've only known a few people who seemed truly masochistic- I base this opinion on that limited sample).

Of course if you don't want to reach out keep doing what you have been doing. That will be sure to keep you a hermit. I do not say this because I have any antipathy towards you, but as a long time people watcher- I feel I can safely say you do not communicate effectively (if you really want to be liked) and the fault is within you. I know you THINK you communicate effectively, but you don't if you never get the result you want.
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