Austin is totally and completely insane. I just got the following private message from him (I cut the message by 25% because it was just too damn long). Dude, what IS your problem????? What the HELL has this got to do with CNC???
"yOU ANY RELATION TO FRANK dEmARCO US POST OFFICE? The Bible very explicitly explains things. There's not really a lot of room for interpretation of the more general points. Let me review some for you:
God created the world in 7 days and he's so powerful that he could do it again anytime he wants. So there.
God will destroy the world (fairly soon) after first taking all of the good Christians with him up to heaven so they can kiss his ass some more. This will occur after a big war between the Christians and the other people (Armageddon).
The physical world is dirty and bad (that's earth) and the spiritual world is clean and good (that's heaven).
As a result of these three things, Christians do not need to do anything to preserve the environment. You're worried about the future of the humpback whale? Whales don't have souls, silly, so they're not important to God. Besides he can just make more. And besides that, he's going to destroy the world soon so what's the point of saving some silly whales now? Here's a sermon that supports my assertion. During the cold war, Christians in our government saw the USSR as the nation of Satan, because they had state-imposed atheism. Obviously, then, they were the power that the United States (God's favored country) would have to defeat in the Armageddon. How best to defeat them? Nuclear strike, of course. But wait! That kills everyone on the planet! No problem, God will spirit the Americans away to heaven whilst the Russians are coughing up their innards! Ha-ha! Good triumphs over evil! The missiles of God nuke Satan in one mighty ku-tchunk.
"You're crazy! You're making this up!" you say? Allow me to quote President Ronald Reagan, "Everything is falling into place. It can't be too long now. Ezekiel says that fire and brimstone will be rained upon the enemies of God's people. That must mean they'll be destroyed by nuclear weapons...Gog, the nation that will lead all of the other powers of darkness against Israel, will come out of the north...Gog must be Russia...now that Russia has set itself against God...it fits the description of Gog perfectly." (quote detail)
Is it safe to have these nuts running a nuclear power? You tell me. We worry when radical Muslim groups have nukes. Why aren't we worried about Christians with nukes? Because everyone seems to think the Christians are the good guys. Check your history.
Back to Contents exually dysfunctional. The local Christian student group here at *deleted* Campus Crusade for Christ--has a new theme that they have pinned up all over campus, put on t-shirts and in full-page advertisements in the Maneater. It goes something like this: there is a picture of a man and a woman in full wedding gear, the bride looking over her shoulder in a "wouldn't you like to be me" sort of way...the caption reads, "What to wear for safer sex." Another version (with no illustration) says, "Practice safe sex, wait until marriage and stay faithful."
This is a prime example of the sick thinking typical of Christians. Everyone knows that by simply driving your car you are in greater danger than from having sex. Why don't Christians suggest that we all abstain from driving until we can all afford our very own road? Because that would be stupid...we put on our seat belts and go out onto the streets as if it were perfectly safe. We do this because the only other option is to stay huddled in our houses paralyzed with fear. This is exactly what the Campus Crusaders want you to do.
I have spoken to countless freshmen--male and female--who have been terrified by conservative propaganda into believing that the first time they have sex they will get pregnant and catch AIDS. Provided that you take the normal precautions, this is as silly as the popular misconception of the 70's that you couldn't get pregnant the first time you had sex. What we are seeing here is a reaction to the 70's and early 80's that rivals the stupidity of those decades, but in reverse. The cause is, simply, Christians.
Christian students are by far the most screwed up about these things. I have a few examples. I will start with the Campus Crusaders...
Specimen number one is a very strange girl who lives in the dorms. She has no contact with males on a one-to-one basis. She is completely asexual. Recently, I saw her sporting one of CCC's lovely t-shirts and overheard her discussing the ingenuity of the Crusaders most recent evil plan. If this girl ever mates, I'll be shocked. She has Jesus, you see, so she doesn't need another man.
But wait, there's more. I used to have a friend who was a Crusader...she shall remain nameless. She was obsessed with maintaining her purity. In order to do so, she went so far as to allow one of her boyfriends to try to have anal sex with her because Jesus, apparently, doesn't mind that because it's not "real sex."
I have a good friend who is dating a frat boy who is a Christian. She's not. Although I haven't had an update in a while, the last I checked he would typically have sex with her and then have an attack of guilt, and tell her that they shouldn't do it anymore. Of course they always do it again. We aren't just talking about a little guilt here, we are talking about a major attack with crying and everything. Of course, he would completely dump her if he found our that she's been with a woman...
I have a positive acquaintance from high school who goes to school here...a couple of years ago one of my other high school acquaintances invited him out to her car for sex. So he went, of course, but right after orgasm he began crying and praying to God for forgiveness because what he had done was so "wrong." The poor girl freaked out and started bawling and had to leave him in the car with Jesus. Now he has sworn off sex. They had been dating for years before this happened. It's not like she twisted his arm and made him do it. He's a nut.
I know another person who invited a girl up to his room one evening, and after no more than 15 minutes she was literally begging him to have sex with her...I quote, "Fuck me, don't keep me waiting," that sort of thing. She left a few hours later. He saw here the next day and, lo and behold, she was a Christian and hadn't even slept that night. She had been up the whole time pacing around, crying, feeling guilty for being such a bad person. Her roommate, also a Christian, had given her a lecture about what a slut she was, too. Wait a minute, you Christians out there are saying, "Oh, I bet that poor girl was RAPED and the bad old guy doing it just said that she begged for it so he'd get away with it!" WRONG! The guy heard it, and so did his roommate and his roommate's girlfriend. And the girl never said she didn't want to have sex, or that the guy raped her.
There is nothing wrong with having sex. (Similarly, there is nothing wrong with not having sex, but Americans have no trouble with that one.) Americans have less sex than Europeans yet we have significantly more unintended pregnancies than Europeans. Why is that? Guilt. Women feel like they can't carry around condoms because that means you were planning on having sex...you have to be "swept off your feet."
Sex is a natural function and a natural need just like hunger and thirst. If you want to have sex with someone, you should do it no matter if you know them or not. Am I advocating anonymous sex? If that's what you want...go for it! If that's not what you want, don't. Either way, it is not immoral as long as no one is hurt in the process. Incidentally, I am betting that very few people want anonymous, meaningless sex in the first place.
Another one of CCC's little posters makes the claim that if you have sex before marriage, you will get your heart broken. That's only in the case where you are trying to use sex to get love. Satisfy your lust with sex and your love through more appropriate venues...you know what they are.
In the Bible, Paul clearly states that, optimally, you should never have sex ever (Theologian, Christian and editor of the Ryrie Study Bible, Charles Caldwell Ryrie, Th.D, Ph.D, agrees with me on this point about Paul). He says that marriage is only a way to make the sinfulness of sex more diluted. Do you really want to adhere to an ideology that condemns a normal, beautiful part of human life?
Back to Contents xpansionism and prejudice. Christians feel that they must spread their sick ideology all over the world. In a way, you can think of it as a Christian Empire. The Catholics started it during the Crusades (where they murdered people of foreign lands who would not succumb to their religion) and the Inquisition (where they murdered citizens of their own country who would not succumb). Interestingly, the local Christian group here on campus at --------------- is "Campus Crusade for Christ." Fortunately, they aren't allowed to murder us for not believing in their little religion or we would have quite a body count on our hands...or their hands, rather.
Currently, it is the Mormons who are doing the greatest amount of conqering (by subtle means). Early in the church's history, they would convert foreign women, telling them about the location of Zion (either Missouri or Utah, depending on who you talk to). The women would then be convinced to go to Zion, where, having spent all their money on the trip, they would be sucked into the cultish Mormon doctrine of polygamy (which, although currently not allowed, is allowed "celestially" and will again be allowed after Jesus comes back for the big war).
Close behind them are the Baptists, who spawned Campus Crusade for Christ. I know a girl who is the daughter of Baptist missionaries (Yes, she is a Christian). She likes her boyfriend to beat her up while they have sex (her boyfriend is also a Christian). What a nice psychological problem to export to other nations! (Note Complaint 4)
We are currently in the midst of a modern-style inquisition in this country. Take Dr. Elders, for example. She is the woman who was fired from the Surgeon General position for suggesting that we should teach masturbation in sex education classes (as a healthy alternative to having sex with lots of people sans protection when you aren't properly informed about how to protect yourself because you were taught sex via a sexually repressive abstinence only sex education program which has made you paralyzed with guilt over your natural biological needs). And what? You want to legalize soft drugs? God might not give us favored nation status if you do that!
Syracuse has a group called Chi Alpha. Once a week they have what they call "Saturday Evangelism." What do they do? I'll let them tell you:
This is the time when we go out and share our experience in knowing God with the other students on campus. We usually lead about two new people to God each week in this way. We split off in pairs and go about sharing the gospel, while a couple of us stay back in the room and pray for those out sharing. Saturdays, 2:00pm, Strates Room, Hendricks Chapel I will translate the above into secular/pagan language: This is the time when we go out into the world and try to suck our fellow students into our sick ideology. We go around in pairs badgering people until we find about 2 people who are naive and weak-willed enough to believe everything we say. Usually these people are alone and feeling lonely, and because there are two of us and only one of them it is easy to convince them that what they believe is meaningless and what we believe is right! This makes us feel like we are more correct in believing what we told them. In hopes that it will keep the evil heathens that we are trying to deceive from beating us up for annoying them, we go out in pairs and we have people stay at the chapel and pray for us.
Back to Contents wo-faced ideology. They say "Thou shall not kill" but that only includes people who are Christians. Followers of Moses had no problem murdering whole cities (including pregnant women--its in the Bible) of non-Christians and the same goes for modern day Christians. I'll be putting up an internet memorial to the victims of Christian atrocities later on, but the numbers are staggering...in the Bible alone, far more people were murdered than in a Nazi's wildest fantasy. During the witch craze in Europe, as many as 9 million (Note from N.: This is an overestimate based on a flawed report made in 1792; A better estimate is around 500,000 between 1500 and 1850) people may have been murdered, mostly after being grotesquely tortured, not to mention the cats that were also tortured and murdered. (For a more detailed list of killings by Christians, read Victims of the Christian Faith.) How about "the meek shall inherit the earth" ? That's hilarious. They preach that one should be weak and puny, but then feel no remorse over murdering foreign people and expanding their boundaries. "Onward Christian soldiers...."
What about that thing about alcohol? Why is it that Christians are so anti-drinking and drug use when their own idol created wine from water as one of his principle "miracles"? Ryan Will, a Catholic, points out that this is one insane thing that his denomination does not believe (i.e., they believe it is OK to have alcohol). Speaking of Catholics, I keep getting mail from insane Protestants saying that Catholics are cultists. Protestants like the "Freemen" are cultists.
God loves you. Ya, right. He just wants people to kiss his ass. If you don't brown-nose adequately, he will throw your soul into a burning lake. What a power-hungry jerk! Now, if there was such a master of the universe, I would pretend to worship him quietly and then kick his ass at the first opportunity. Isn't that what Lucifer did? By the way, the Christian excuse for why God created humans is that the angels had no choice but to worship him, so he wanted to create little beings that would worship him by choice. Ponder that for a few moments. Point being, Lucifer is the great hero of the mythos of the Bible. God is an evil beast, or an evil dictator at best.
Back to Contents reate and feed on fear. The entire basis of Christianity is fear. You fear death, and so they offer you a nice place called "heaven" where your "soul" goes when you die. "You don't really die," they coo in your ear sweetly, "If you accept Jesus into your heart, you can live Forever!" So wait a minute, I don't automatically live forever! Uh-oh! What's this bargain I have to make? Well, I just have to live according to His rules, blah blah blah. But (because there is no He) what I end up doing is living my life in self-deception surrounded by others who are deluding themselves in order to feel good, too. And I miss out on many aspects of life...hey wait, wasn't that what I was worried about losing in the first place? Hey but that's not all. Now we know that your "soul" goes to heaven if you follow their little rules...what happens if you don't? Well, you soul will be thrown into a "dark, unspeakable place" and you will burn forever in a "lake of fire." Hey! Where I come from, that's a threat! Or, in other words, motivating your opponent with FEAR. Where I come from, that's considered to be rude. Now they are feeding on your fear of AIDS. Yes, AIDS is something to be afraid of, but they have labeled it as "God's punishment for those who disobey His Law." What happened to the lake of fire? There never was any lake of fire. They didn't generate enough fear with the Hell fairy tale so they have to latch on to some real-world evil and say that it came from God. (Why would God send evil on those he loves?) Don't go out and have sex, now! Nothing will save you from God's hideous wrath! Just from having sex once, even if it's your virgin boyfriend, you'll develop hideous sores, your organs will liquefy and your brain will ooze out your nose! That's what you get for being bad!
What else are you afraid of? You're afraid of being a bad person. You want you life to be justifiable and good. You want to look back on your life when you are 70 and say, "Hey, I was a good person." Christianity makes this easy for you. All you have to do is believe in Jesus! Wow! You believe in Jesus? You must be a good person. Those other people who don't believe in Jesus, they're bad people. I have news for you: Jesus was a bigoted, power-hungry jerk.
Back to Contents ompletely insane. Christians have a number of beliefs that defy all logic... The correctness of the information in the Bible is of central importance to Christian faith. One reason it is often said to be factual is because it is the Word of God, and, therefore, must be true. Also, Christian scholars point out that the Bible portrays many factual historical events, and, therefore, the religious aspects of those events must truly have happened as well.
God is said to have written the Bible through the hands of others. Their names are recorded as the authors of the text. No one ever thinks to wonder why it is that we trust these men to tell the truth...that they were really communicated to by God. Human history is full of people who have claimed to speak to God but have been proven to be fakes. In this case, we are not only taking the authors' word for it, but also the word of the translators and librarians of the early Catholic church. The earliest manuscripts of the books of the Bible are dated at around 400 AD, which leaves over 300 years for falsifications to have occurred. Yes, this date is subject to debate, but Sir Frederic G. Kenyon, formerly Director and Principal Librarian of the British Museum, summarized the evidence for the validity of the new Testament as follows:
"In no other case is the interval of time between the composition of the book and the date of the earliest extant [presently existing] manuscripts so short as in that of the New Testament. The books of the New Testament were written in the latter part of the first century; the earliest extant manuscripts (trifling scraps excepted) are of the fourth century -- say, from 250 to 300 years later." I found that quote on a Christian's page, by the way. If you want me to believe that a guy was really God and that he "died for my sins" (whatever that means) and rose from the dead, I want the paper that came out the next day; I want a sworn statement from at least 3 witnesses IN WRITING; I want some pictures, damn it! Seriously: if I am expected to believe that a miracle happened, then it must be more irrational to deny the evidence than it is to deny the miracle. Christianity has never come close to meeting this criteria. Furthermore, assuming that these men are really reporting the Word of God, how do we know that God is telling the truth? The only real reason to believe it is because you believe the people who told it to you, and they believed the people who told it to them, and so forth.
The historical content of the Bible is well established. What is not well established are the magical events that take place in the context of those historical events. For instance, the Jews supposedly blew a magical horn which brought down the walls of Jericho. Some people have said that this is proof to the validity of the Bible because archeologists have shown that the city was destroyed at about the time the Bible indicates. No one said, however, that the Jews destroyed the city via a magical musical instrument; this part is clearly myth." |