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Politics : PRESIDENT GEORGE W. BUSH
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To: Neocon who wrote (30609)8/20/2000 4:44:36 PM
From: Alexandermf  Read Replies (1) of 769667
 
Neocon, Here is a good one for you from my Australian Friend

Actual label instructions on consumer products:
>
>1. On a blanket from Taiwan -
> NOT TO BE USED AS PROTECTION FROM A TORNADO.
>
>2. On a helmet mounted mirror used by US cyclists -
> REMEMBER, OBJECTS IN THE MIRROR ARE ACTUALLY
> BEHIND YOU.
>
>3. On a Taiwanese shampoo -
> USE REPEATEDLY FOR SEVERE DAMAGE.
>
>4. On the bottle-top of a (UK) flavoured milk drink
> AFTER OPENING, KEEP UPRIGHT.
>
>5. On a New Zealand insect spray -
> THIS PRODUCT NOT TESTED ON ANIMALS.
>
>6. In a US guide to setting up a new computer -
> TO AVOID CONDENSATION FORMING, ALLOW THE BOXES TO
> WARM UP TO ROOM TEMPERATURE BEFORE OPENING.
> (Sensible, but the instruction was INSIDE the box.)
>
>7. On a Japanese product used to relieve painful
> haemorrhoids
> LIE DOWN ON BED AND INSERT POSCOOL SLOWLY UP TO
> THE PROJECTED PORTION LIKE A SWORD-GUARD INTO ANAL
> DUCT. WHILE INSERTING POSCOOL FOR APPROXIMATELY 5
> MINUTES, KEEP QUIET.
>
>8. In some countries, on the bottom of Coke bottles
> OPEN OTHER END.
>
>9. On a packet of Sunmaid raisins -
> WHY NOT TRY TOSSING OVER YOUR FAVOURITE BREAKFAST
> CEREAL?
>
>10. On a Sears hairdryer -
> DO NOT USE WHILE SLEEPING.
>
>11. On a bag of Fritos -
> YOU COULD BE A WINNER! NO PURCHASE NECESSARY.
> DETAILS INSIDE.
>
>12. On a bar of Dial soap -
> DIRECTIONS - USE LIKE REGULAR SOAP.
>
>13. On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom
> of the box)-
> DO NOT TURN UPSIDE DOWN.
>
>14. On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding -
> PRODUCT WILL BE HOT AFTER HEATING.
>
>15. On a Korean kitchen knife -
> WARNING KEEP OUT OF CHILDREN.
>
>16. On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights -
> FOR INDOOR OR OUTDOOR USE ONLY.
>
>17. On a Japanese food processor -
> NOT TO BE USED FOR THE OTHER USE.
>
>18. On Sainsbury's peanuts -
> WARNING - CONTAINS NUTS.
>
>19. On an American Airlines packet of nuts
> INSTRUCTIONS - OPEN PACKET, EAT NUTS.
>
> 20. On a Swedish chainsaw -
> DO NOT ATTEMPT TO STOP CHAIN WITH YOUR
> HANDS.
>
>21. On a child's superman costume -
> WEARING OF THIS GARMENT DOES NOT ENABLE YOU TO FLY.
>
>22. On some frozen dinners
> SERVING SUGGESTION DEFROST.
>
>23. On a hotel provided shower cap in a box
> FITS ONE HEAD.
>
>24. On packaging for a Rowenta iron
> DO NOT IRON CLOTHES ON BODY.
>
>25. On Boot's "Children's" cough medicine
> DO NOT DRIVE CAR OR OPERATE MACHINERY.
>
>26. On Nytol sleep aid
> WARNING MAY CAUSE DROWSINESS.
>
>
>
> Submitted by: Whattadeal @ aol.com
>
> \\|//
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>------------oOOo-(_)-oOOo-----------------------------------------------
>
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