Truth about Harvard admissions: only one's last name counts!!
So you ain't direct descendant of Chairman Mao or Genghis Khan?
The compilers of [the Harvard Alumni] directory even cooked up a "suggested Harvard menu," confected of such surnames as Coolbroth, Herring, Woodcock, Greenleaf, Pfankuchen, Sauerwein, and Coffee. Two generations later, Christopher S. Johnson '64, a contributing editor of Harvard Magazine, undertook to speed-read the 1980 directory's 1,957 pages. In the magazine's "College Pump" column, he shared some of his findings:
Here, some 220,000 strong, are names to conjure with (like Ala and Kazan); names to drop (like Spillum, Bump, Bopp, Cronk, and Bang); names to trade on (Sale, Profit, Asset, and Cash); and even four people whose name is Mudd.
Here are bite-size names, like Ha and Ho and H'ng; names that make ruminative mouthfuls, like Gumrukcuoglu and Chunhaswasdikul and Satkunananthan. Here are names from Blessing, Joy, and Comfort to Angst and Apathy. Names from Evers to Tinker to Chance. Lock, Stock, and Barrel; Ragland, Taggart, and Bobskill; the whole Kita and Caputo....
There is no dearth of strangers we'd like to introduce: Ambush to Pray; Scissors to Shear; Gobbel to Chew; Fiery to Melting; Dapper to Cute; or Kukuck to Kchouk. No lack of individuals we'd like to set up in partnerships: Ezzo, Eze, Everding, and Erf. Fliflet, Fligler, Flotten, and Freeth. Fruzy, Frum, and Fybish. Booger, Bagger, and Borababy. Countermine, Shirk, Delay, Forget, and Vanish. Madrigal, Musick, and Earwaker. Loose, Libertine, Lusted, and Lyeth. Dearworth, Golly, and Goodheart. Haymaker, Papermaster, and Woolfolk. Greenhouse, Grotto, and Herbsman. Solberg, Sailor, Tinker, Tailor; Richman, Poorman, Beckerman, Thieck; Doctor, Lawyer, Ingraham, Cheek. The More the Marier....
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