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Strategies & Market Trends : Drillbits & Bottlerockets

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To: Rich1 who wrote (4916)	3/5/2001 2:36:11 PM
From: Original Mad Dog	Read Replies (1) of 15481

I think a big part of it is that we are too caught up in trying to explain why this stuff happens, and making excuses for it. Which of these following statements is true about the latest school shooters: 1. They had a bad childhood. 2. Their parents (if they were even around) didn't love them or make them feel loved. 3. They did a bad thing and should be held accountable. The only thing we know for sure is that #3 is true. The kids might very well have had a bad childhood, but that is only an excuse, and is not always the case. Their parents or other caregivers may have done a bad job, but not necessarily....and all of us here who are parents know that parenting and making kids feel loved is tremendously difficult because it doesn't just mean hugging and encouraging them a lot. It also can mean being strict and setting limits in a way that sometimes causes them to accuse you of not loving them. Rather than making excuses for the kids' behavior, rather than pandering to public fear with nonsensically applied "zero tolerance" policies which expel kids for having some Tylenol in their pocket, we should concentrate on (1) holding people who do this accountable; (2) restricting kids' access to weapons and making it as difficult to get weapons into a school as it is to get them onto an airplane; (3) educating people on what it means to be as good a parent as possible; and (4) intervening personally to talk to kids who we see experiencing a problem or some kind of dangerous behavior (I know a couple of people who have literally changed dozens of lives for the better this way). Most of the time the media post mortems on this sort of thing will just prattle on about how bad the kids' childhood was, which only serves to discourage the many other people with bad childhoods from striving to rise above what life has dealt them. Sure their parents might have been bad, probably were not great parents. But there are a couple billion parents in the world, and hundreds of millions of them are bad parents. Blaming them doesn't solve the problem. BTW, Rich, this is not aimed at your comment. I largely agree with what you said....and I commend you for having the strength to intervene and battle for your daughter's future.

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