I can't believe the abuse you are hurling at us (Perfect Trader apparently hired me five days ago without my knowledge).
I was going to call you scum and dare you to ban me, my children and their future progeny, but employing ForeSight Employee Training provided to me by what is soon to be my ex employer, I will simply offer you a free upgrade coupon to last years version, Almost-PerfectTrader 2000©.
Its a pretty good application, really, almost missing the short of a lifetime by about, oh, 2500 or so Nasdaq points. But certainly you can't hold that against the system since it won't actually kick out the sell short order until most Nasdaq names are at zero or IBM is acquired by PepsiCo.
If you simply call our tool-free [spelling intended] upgrade line at 1-900-IAM-LOST, press option 3, then 2, then 1, no wait, press option 2 first and then 3, unless you press 1 first and we meant all along that you should press 4 and no other buttons.
4 is the correct option for upgrades but thanks to your grasp of instructions you have now ordered three copies of our new Forward-Testing Strategy Optimization application, Chrono-Trader Expert 2002©, a future and as yet undesigned (but we are certain it will be good) member of the 20/20 HindSight© family of products.
We'll start billing you now and will deliver Chrono-Trader Expert 2002© at some point in the year two thousand and six.
'Bing' Oh - a trade for the next century was just registered in my FuturePortfolio(tm) and wow look at that future profit! Gotta run!
PerfectTrader - your credit card number will do perfectly (sm). |
