How many here have had a squirrel in their beds? Raise hands, please.
Thanks. I just need reassurance that this is a very ordinary, everyday kind of event. What better place to ask than the Sauna, where folks are so helpful and give every indication of even being normal people, more or less.
Last night my wife (J) summoned me to the bedroom to tell me that after falling asleep, something had run across her head. I tried to act as though I totally believed this, which wasn't easy. I even went so far as to go through the motions of a careful search of the bedroom and my adjoining office, which (of course) came up with nothing. I let her come to her own conclusion that this was all a dream. Then I brought up our Goldens, and we all prepared for a restful night.
A few minutes later, we heard Scarlett race for my office. We turned on the light, and she had her nose jammed into a narrow corner next to my bookcase. A flashlight revealed droppings there, adding some credibility to J's claim. Then Melanie joined in, the dogs scurried around furiously, and ... something streaked across the room. What happened in the next hour is mostly a blur. There was J on the bed, knees drawn to her chest, there were S & M flying around in all directions, there was something else traveling at the speed of light in all directions at once, there was S & M grabbing and then losing a ball of fur over and over, and there was me trying to slam down a tupperware bowl on some invisible phantom. On the 347th try, there was a juvenile squirrel under the bowl.
So I just need to know how many of you have had the same experience. Say within the last week. It is going to make me feel a lot better to know that its most everyone.
We never counted on this. We live in a pretty nice house in a pretty nice neighborhood. There are restrictive covenants in our deed, such as no motorcyles, no cars on blocks, no RVs on the lawn, no garage sales, and no raising livestock in the house (I think). So we thought we were covered. But apparently(!) not.
Its all over now, the rooms have had a meticulous cleaning, the crtter was released in the woods with a stern warning not to return. But now we feel violated. Our most private space has been invaded. We may need therapy to get over this. Is this normal? Do you all feel the same when it happens to you?
Actually, this is shaping up as one of the worst centuries ever. It's only the first year, and already we have had the worst stock market crash ever, I am about to lose my first organ ever to a surgeon (another story), and now this happens. I wish I could find someone with a crystal ball who could tell me what else is going to happen in the next ninety-nine years that will be a first for for me. Oh well, whatever it may be, I suppose it can't be any worse.
Thanks, guys, for any comfort you can bring me here.
JC |
