Sex becomes decent when the participants have reached an age where they can reasonably handle the consequences.
I think that we are confusing "decent" with "smart".
Otherwise, I agree. The problem is that some people may be more ready to reasonably handle the consequences at 17 than other are at 30. Some may never be ready.
The question, then, is who gets to decide when someone is ready. The answer is that the individuals involved decide. We may pretend that the parents of minors make the decision, but in reality they don't: if kids decide that they want to have sex, it is virtually impossible for parents, or anybody else, to stop them.
Parents, schools, and government cannot decide when young people are ready for sex. They can, however, provide young people with the information and the reasoning skills that they need to make an intelligent evaluation of their own readiness and of the risks involved. That is what we need to do: teach reasoning skills, provide the information necessary for their effective use, and give young people the self-confidence to make decisions based on long-term self interest, rather than on the desire for approval or physical affection.
Harping on "decency" or "morality" only clouds the issue. |
