Text of Condit's letter to constituents
'I have cooperated' The following is the text of the letter sent by Rep. Gary Condit, D-Calif., to his constituents.
Condit's words, Condit's thoughts
Dear Friends and Neighbors,
I'll decide who my friends are, and living 2500 miles away from you in Washington, DC does not make you my neighbor.
Chandra Levy has been missing for nearly four months.
True statement. The only one, hehehe
I'm sorry that the pain the Levy family and Chandra's friends are feeling has grown worse with each passing day.
I'm sorry that I feel your pain and I wish it would go away; I have an election coming up.
When Chandra's dad called me to tell me she was missing, he asked for my help.
I lied to all the rest of his and his wife's questions, but the sneaky bastards already knew the answers - shit!
I contacted the police to see if a reward fund would help find her. They said it would, so I helped start one.
I thought it would show my concern and enhance my public image. But it only worked for a little while. Shit!
Since that day, and every day since, I have cooperated and worked with law enforcement to find Chandra. I invited the police to my apartment. I asked the FBI to help.
I cooperated to the least possible extent and only under my terms, to deflect suspicion from me. I invited a search of my apartment after anything incriminating was disposed of (damn watch box and that butthead who saw me in Virginia). Note to self: Get "witness removal" referral from Bubba.
Despite my best attempts to help the police find Chandra, some in the media have criticized me for remaining "silent."
Despite my best attempts to hinder the police finding Chandra, almost unanimously, the media have rightfully criticized me for remaining "silent." What do they want - a confession? Never happen, this Congressman job is too cushy to give up without a fight.
I have not been silent with those in charge of finding Chandra.
I've lied and "misspoke as much as I could to those in charge of finding Chandra
I have answered every single question asked by the police and FBI.
I have delayed as long as possible answering every single question asked by the police and FBI with as many lies and misleading statements as my staff and lawyers thought I could get away with
When tabloids turned the tragedy of Chandra's disappearance into a spectacle and rumors were reported as facts, I decided that I would not discuss my private life in the media.
When everybody in the media, except Dan Rather, God Bless him, turned on me and stopped buying my spin, I decided to shut up before I convicted myself. I thought that was a nice touch when we phoned in an anonymous tip that Chandra was buried under the parking lot concrete at that military base in Virginia. Boy, did the media take one on the chin when the FBI said it was a hoax. The best part is, they never even looked under the concrete to see if it was true. Of, course we tipped them to the wrong parking lot - bwahahahahah!
Some suggest that not talking with the media could mean I had something to do with Chandra's disappearance. I did not. I pray that she has not met the same fate as the other young women who have disappeared from the same neighborhood.
I didn't do it, but I know who did. I pray that nobody ever finds out it was the same one's who did the other two. It cost me a fortune to get them out of the country and buy their silence. Note to self: check balance in campaign accounts, schedule fund raisers with the saps who still believe in me.
I will be interviewed on television and hopefully I will be able to answer questions that help people understand.
...hopefully I will be able to answer questions with Bubba's sincerity (but Abbe said NO FINGER WAGGING) that help people understand that I am asshole deep in debt to the Jamaicans, the lawyers and everyone else who is a potential witness.
It is not something I look forward to. But things have gone on long enough.
I dread this as much as anything, but my back is against the wall and Abbe has structured the interview completely in my favor, just like the lie detector test. God, this HAS to work.
Before speaking to the media I wanted to write to you. I have known so many of you for a long time. You know me to be hard working, committed to our issues and dedicated to my community and my family. I hope you also will understand that I am not perfect and have made my share of mistakes.
Before speaking to the media I wanted to write to you so I could give my spin first.
You think you know me to be hard working, committed to our issues and dedicated to my community and my family. WRONG! I am dedicated to me and saving my ass.
I hope you also will understand that I am not perfect and have made my share of mistakes. There's no way in hell that Chandra should have died in that biker party in Virginia.
For 30 years as a local Mayor, County Supervisor, State Assemblyman and Congressman, thousands of people have come to me with their personal problems. A son in trouble, a mother in a nursing home, a job that was lost, a farm going broke, a mortgage that couldn't be paid.
Blackmailers, every friggin one of them. But it's paid out of compaign funds and keeps getting me elected.
And each time, people trusted that I would treat their problems with care.
I guess they would trust me. They had me over the extortion barrel.
I hope our relationship is strong enough to endure all of this.
Look scumbags, either we hang together or we shall surely hang separately. Wish there was a way to use that patriotic crap in this letter and the damn interviews coming up.
For now, I want my work in Congress to improve our communities. Please know that you can still bring me your concerns and your problems.
And it will cost you up the yingyang because I need money, lots of money. Abbe alone is 400 friggin dollars an hour.
Thank you for the kindness you have shown Carolyn and my family.
Thanks for not burning me at the stake and stoning my family.
Sincerely,
Gary Condit
EAT $HIT AND DIE, SUCKERS!!! BWAHAHAHAHA
|
