BUSH WILL BE IN CHARGE WHILE CHENEY RECOVERS
'I'M IN CHARGE HERE', SAYS PREZ
WASHINGTON, D.C. March 6th - The White House announced that George W. Bush will be in charge of things while Vice President Cheney is recovering in the the hospital from some heart pains. "I'll be taking care of things for the next few days," President Bush said in a news conference today.
"So you can direct all the questions to me. But don't ask too many of 'em. I'm still figuring it all out."
President Bush was asked by a reporter whether or not Vice President Cheney would be given a rest, and he answered in his quick Texas style.
"No. Hell No. He needs to be here to help me--er I mean the Republic. His service is needed. Badly. Quickly."
"In fact Dick, if you are watching this, I need to know...what does the red button do? -- you know, the button that's in between the two green buttons? And how do you say that Russian guy's name. Is it Vlady-mere or Vlad -uh - mere?"
Doctors said they are not sure what caused Vice President Cheney's heart pains although the Bush administration is quick to point out it has nothing to do with the fact that he had been put in charge of dealing with Congress, negotiating with China and Russia, solving the California Power Crisis, trading barbs with Tim Russert, hiring most of the Cabinet, adding up budget numbers and making sure the President doesn't sleep past 11 am each morning.
(c) Bruce Carlson 2001 |
