We are coming to learn now that many past celebrities were gay, or perhaps bi... Owing to the conventions of the time, each of these actors married and had children. There is every likelihood that they did so to protect their careers, and that their true leaning was to alternative sexuality. But ironically, convention forced them to end up with the best of both worlds. They could have the kind of sex that they preferred, and still have families to surround them.
Here's a piece from yesterday's paper on just that...
observer.co.uk
What develops is a touching, mutually-protective relationship: she makes excuses for the cuts on his forehead or the bruised jaw; he dances attendance, and dedicates himself to the children he almost missed having.
In evolutionary terms, too, the marrying gay is on to a winner: he secures the right to pass on his genes, rather than forego the reproductive imperative in order - according to the latest research - to assist his siblings' children. (Gay men, evidence suggests, are often born later in families, as if their role as younger brothers was to nurture and support nephews and nieces.) By marrying, too, the gay man ensures access to his children, should he separate from their mother.
What's in it for her? If a man doesn't marry you because he fancies you rotten, you can be pretty sure that he's committed to you as a companion - and to the children you have together as his pride and joy. Marry a gay man and you do away with the tension (at first so exciting, but ultimately so exhausting) of being with a sexual aggressor who's ever on the prowl and whose every thought bubble is of you in a pussy-pelmet and stilettos. Sexual ambivalence may not always prove a salivating turn on - but it never leads to the bitter hang-over of a wham-bam thank you ma'am session.
You said:
Our modern view is that they were hypocrites, and that they never should have allowed society to force them to conceal or deny their true sexuality.
Article...
Hypocrisy? No, constructive behaviour modification of our he-Tarzan, she-Jane world.
Admit it, JC. You're really Christina Odone in drag...<g> and, of course, if that's your preference that's fine <gg>
the default setting for humanity is marriage, children, and family.
Hello? Marriage? Bzzt, wrong - societal construct. Mating and children are natural for humanity: regularising the grouping after the birth of children (very likely pre-contraception) may be... Marriage is not.
Nor are you your child. I doubt many parents would truly claim to know the inner mind of their teenager <g>... older is (should be) wiser about yourself, and you may apply this to others. Anyhow, what's cool at 21 may be passe by 31, so WTF.
Remember, BTW, that plenty of heterosexual people are childless, at whatever age... not necessarily by choice, but sometimes even couples. Bitterness is not inevitable, nor loneliness.
That's selfish gene programming; but our brains have evolved beyond that, if you let them. |
