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Politics : Sharks in the Septic Tank
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To: J. C. Dithers who wrote (36647)11/12/2001 7:54:03 PM
From: Lane3  Read Replies (1) of 82486
 
Karen, how cold-hearted your post sounds.

Not cold hearted. Rational. You'd be nuts to feel pain over a woman you might have married had she been allowed to be born decades earlier in some distant state. Or pain over a woman you didn't get to marry because she was never conceived because, after consideration of abortion, her older sister was carried to term after which her mother had her tubes tied because she had enough children. Or the woman who wasn't conceived because her father developed chicken pox. Or the woman you never met because she had the flu and didn't attend the party where she might have met you. Or the woman who didn't attend the party because she was murdered on the way by some gangster who might have been aborted but wasn't. You'd never know about any of those women. How can you feel loss over something that you have no way of knowing you might have had if fate had moved in some other direction.

Of course women grieve over a miscarriage if they've lost something they care about. They have a relationship with that fetus--an interest in its survival. If, OTOH, they slough off an embryo while training for the Olympics and don't even know it, where's the loss? The pain? You can't feel the pain of loss over something you don't even know you've lost. Not if you're sane, anyway.

I'm too well grounded to suffer pain over the loss of someone I might have cared about had I had the opportunity to meet him.

Karen
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