Ripper: Mandrake? Mandrake: Yes, Jack? Ripper: Have you ever seen a Commie drink a glass of water? Mandrake: Well, I can't say I have. Ripper: Vodka, that's what they drink, isn't it? Never water? Mandrake: Well, I-I believe that's what they drink, Jack, yes. Ripper: On no account will a Commie ever drink water, and not without good reason. Mandrake: Oh, eh, yes. I, uhm, can't quite see what you're getting at, Jack. Ripper: Water, that's what I'm getting at, water. Mandrake, water is the source of all life. Seven-tenths of this earth's surface is water. Why, do you realize that seventy percent of you is water? Mandrake: Uh, uh, Good Lord! Ripper: And as human beings, you and I need fresh, pure water to replenish our dissipated precious bodily fluids. Mandrake: Yes. (he begins to chuckle nervously) Ripper: Are you beginning to understand? Mandrake: Yes. (more laughter) Ripper: Mandrake. Mandrake, have you never wondered why I drink only distilled water, or rain water, and only pure-grain alcohol? Mandrake: Well, it did occur to me, Jack, yes. Ripper: Have you ever heard of a thing called fluoridation. Fluoridation of water? Mandrake: Uh? Yes, I-I have heard of that, Jack, yes. Yes. Ripper: Well, do you know what it is? Mandrake: No, no I don't know what it is, no. Ripper: Do you realize that fluoridation is the most monstrously conceived and dangerous Communist plot we have ever had to face? |