from a yahoo board
The following questions and answers were
collected from SAT tests given in Springdale,
Arkansas in 2000 to 16 year old students! (Don't
laugh too hard - one of these may be the
president someday.)
Q: Name the four seasons.
A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
Q: Explain one of the processes by which water
can be made safe to drink.
A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because
it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead
sheep and canoeists.
Q: How is dew formed?
A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes
them perspire.
Q: What is a planet?
A: A body of earth surrounded by sky.
Q: What causes the tides in the oceans?
A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and
the Moon. All water tends to flow towards the
moon, because there is no water on the moon, and
nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun
joins in this fight.
Q: In a democratic society, how important are
elections?
A: Very important. Sex can only happen when a
male gets an election.
Q: What are steroids?
A: Things for keeping carpets still on the
stairs.
Q: What happens to your body as you age?
A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you
get intercontinental.
Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
A: He says good-bye to his boyhood and looks
forward to his adultery.
Q; Name a major disease associated with
cigarettes.
A: Premature death.
Q: How can you delay milk turning sour?
A: Keep it in the cow.
Q: How are the main parts of the body
categorized? (E.g., abdomen.)
A: The body is consisted into three parts - the
brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity.
The branium contains the brain, the borax
contains the heart and lungs, and the abdominal
cavity contains the five bowels, A,E,I,O and U.
Q: What is the Fibula?
A: A small lie.
Q: What does "varicose" mean?
A: Nearby.
Q: What is the most common form of birth control?
A: Most people prevent contraception by wearing a
condominium.
Q: Give the meaning of the term "Caesarean
Section."
A: The caesarean section is a district in Rome.
Q: What is a seizure?
A: A Roman emperor.
Q: What is a terminal illness?
A: When you are sick at the airport
Q: Give an example of a fungus. What is a
characteristic feature?
A: Mushrooms. They always grow in damp places
and so they look like umbrellas.
Q: What does the word "benign" mean?
A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.
Q: What is a turbine?
A: Something an Arab wears on his head.
Q: What is a Hindu?
A: It lays eggs. |
