And now for something completely different:
World Cup Soccer Fans: Werucome!
By Amy Chavez
The Japan Times, 'Japan Lite' June 8, 2002
In Japan, we have only two languages: Japanese and a dialect of English called Japanese English. JE is Japan's second language. I call it Zen English because you can't translate it directly. A lot of the meaning is left up to the listener. Entire sentences are often expressed in just two words. For example, "Troussier coachi" means "Philippe Troussier is the coach of the Japan national soccer team." Once you learn how to fill in the verbs, predict prepositions and substitute letters, you'll find that JE is actually a very easy language to learn.
Here is your JE pocket dictionary to the World Cup games:
Werucome!--Welcome!
This shows one of the many rules of JE pronunciation. In the JE alphabet, the wild card letters are l,r.s,f,o,u,t and d. These letters can be inserted, deleted or substituted freely.
Warudo Kappu sakka --World Cup soccer
The pronunciation of warudo is like the name Waldo, but the "w" pronounced "oo" as in "oo-aldo". It can best be imitated by
mimicking the sounds of a loon. Not your average loon, however--one with an injury to his left wing. In the word "sakka," the r has been thrown off the field completely. Sakka is pronounced with a hesitation between the two k's. Act as if you have just gotten a fish bone stuck in your throat and momentarily had the wind blocked from your windpipe. Isn't this fun? Warudo Kuppu sakka Japan. Means "World Cup Soccer is taking place in Japan this year."
No supeaku Engurishu--this phrase is used more like a self-defense weapon to ward off impending cross-cultural encounters. It is usually accompanied by a gesture of crossing the arms to make an "X" which means "no," "can't," or "impossible."
Okkay--okay, pronounced with a fish bone stuck in your throat.
Sankyu--Thank you. 'th' is replaced with 's'.
Nicu to meeto you, hahahaha! For some reason, this phrase is always followed by a laugh. JE is full of humor!
"How rongu stay Japan?" means "How long will you be in Japan?" "ooea stay Japan?" means, "Where are you staying while you're here in Japan?" Getting the hang of it?
Huan--Fan. "I am Nakata's huan," means "I am a fan of Hidetoshi Nakata," or, "I am Japanese."
beri goodo--Very good. "Nigeria huan beri goodo" means "The Nigerian fans were awesome!"
Skinheado--Shaved head. "Ono is skinheado" means "Ono has a shaved head." Sometimes you have to misunderstand English in order to understand JE.
Keisu by keisu--case by case. A catchall phrase meaning: it depends, maybe, no, sometimes, at times, or possibly. "Japan caisu by caisu" means, "The Japanese national team will win some games and lose some games depending on the strength of the teams they play against."
Reberu uppu--Level up. This has nothing to do with stadium rows or levels. It means to improve or advance to a higher skill
level. "Inamoto, reberu uppu Engurando" means "Junichi Inamoto advanced to the England Premier League."
Bakku--Back. Means to go back home, or back to where someone came from. "Nakata baku" means Hidetoshi Nakata went back to Italy, will go back to Italy or is going back to Italy. Take your pick. JE is flexible!
My kaa--My car. Also means your car or anybody else's car. Why we need a phrase for this, no one knows. "Saitama stajiumu my kaa" means, "Let's go to Saitama stadium by car."
Goru--Goal. "Japan 2 goru secondo." Means the Japanese team scored two goals in the second half of the game.
Fowado, middofiruda, deefenda --Forward, midfielder and defender. The word "fowado" accompanied by sucking in air between the teeth means, "Japan's weak point is that it has no strong forwards for scoring."
Skinshippu--an invented word, "skinship," means togetherness. Warudo Kappu skinshippu means, "The World Cup brings togetherness."
Now, try speaking Japanese English yourself: Warudo Kappu beri enjoy! or "Please enjoy the World Cup!"
Beri goodo! |
