The Onion got this spot on, looks like: blast from the past...
theonion.com
"My fellow Americans," Bush said, "at long last, we have reached the end of the dark period in American history that will come to be known as the Clinton Era, eight long years characterized by unprecedented economic expansion, a sharp decrease in crime, and sustained peace overseas. The time has come to put all of that behind us."
Bush swore to do "everything in [his] power" to undo the damage wrought by Clinton's two terms in office, including selling off the national parks to developers,
check, not forgetting snowmobiles
going into massive debt to develop expensive and impractical weapons technologies,
working on it
and passing sweeping budget cuts that drive the mentally ill out of hospitals and onto the street.
or maybe trying to appoint them to cabinet posts. whichever.
During the 40-minute speech, Bush also promised to bring an end to the severe war drought that plagued the nation under Clinton, assuring citizens that the U.S. will engage in at least one Gulf War-level armed conflict in the next four years.
Well, yee-haw. Got that one... spot on, looks like.
...
"We as a people must stand united, banding together to tear this nation in two," Bush said. "Much work lies ahead of us: The gap between the rich and the poor may be wide, be there's much more widening left to do. We must squander our nation's hard-won budget surplus on tax breaks for the wealthiest 15 percent. And, on the foreign front, we must find an enemy and defeat it."
oops, what was that about finding OBL? Still, at least that pesky surplus is gone.
"The insanity is over," Bush said. "After a long, dark night of peace and stability, the sun is finally rising again over America. We look forward to a bright new dawn not seen since the glory days of my dad."
Who needs satire when you're led by a vegetable. Oh well, at least we're all delighted by what his inspired leadership has done for the US economy in general and the stock market in particular. Explains Clinton's phrase, really. First the US had the economy... now it's got stupid.
Just thought you'd appreciate this retrospective. I can't wait to see him campaign on his record... LOL. |
