Redneck Valentine Poem
Feb 14, 2003
Collards is green,
My dog's name is Blue
And I'm so lucky
To have a sweet thang like you.
Yore hair is like cornsilk
A-flapping in the breeze.
Softer than Blue's
And without all them fleas.
You have som'a yore teeth,
For which I am proud;
I hold my head high
When we're in a crowd.
Still them fellers at work
They all want to know,
What I did to deserve
Such a purty, young doe.
Like a good roll of duct tape
Yore there fer yore man,
To patch up life's troubles
And stick 'em in the can.
Yore as cute as a junebug
A-buzzin' overhead.
You ain't mean like no far ant
Upon which I oft' tread.
Cut from the best cloth
Like a plaid flannel shirt,
You spark up my life
More than a fresh load of dirt.
When you hold me real tight
Like a padded gunrack,
My life is complete;
Ain't nuthin' I lack.
Yore complexion, it's perfection,
Like the best vinyl sidin'.
Despite all the years,
Yore age, it keeps hidin'.
And when you get old
Like a '67 Chevy,
Won't put you on blocks
And let grass grow up heavy.
Me 'n you's like a Moon Pie
With a RC cold drank,
We go together
Like a skunk goes with stank.
Some men, they buy chocolate
For Valentine's Day;
They git it at WalMart,
It's romantic that way.
Some men git roses
On that special day
From the cooler at PigglyWiggly.
"That's impressive," I say.
Some men buy fine diamonds
From a flea market booth.
"Diamonds are forever,"
They explain, suave and cooth.
But for this man, honey,
These will not do.
Cause yore too special,
You sweet thang you.
I got you a gift,
Without taste nor odor,
Better than diamonds
It's a new trollin' motor.
Well, what do you thank? Ain't that just the most romantic pome ya ever red?
Anonymous.
No, I did not write it. |
