The perfect trading system: time travel
This is from the same source that brought you "Bat Boy"; I found it just in time for April Fools Day too.
'TIME-TRAVELER' BUSTED FOR INSIDER TRADING
Wednesday March 19, 2003
By CHAD KULTGEN
NEW YORK -- Federal investigators have arrested an enigmatic Wall Street wiz on insider-trading charges -- and incredibly, he claims to be a time-traveler from the year 2256!
Sources at the Security and Exchange Commission confirm that 44-year-old Andrew Carlssin offered the bizarre explanation for his uncanny success in the stock market after being led off in handcuffs on January 28.
"We don't believe this guy's story -- he's either a lunatic or a pathological liar," says an SEC insider.
"But the fact is, with an initial investment of only $800, in two weeks' time he had a portfolio valued at over $350 million. Every trade he made capitalized on unexpected business developments, which simply can't be pure luck.
"The only way he could pull it off is with illegal inside information. He's going to sit in a jail cell on Rikers Island until he agrees to give up his sources."
The past year of nose-diving stock prices has left most investors crying in their beer. So when Carlssin made a flurry of 126 high-risk trades and came out the winner every time, it raised the eyebrows of Wall Street Watchdogs. "If a company's stock rose due to a merger or technological breakthrough that was supposed to be secret, Mr. Carlssin somehow knew about it in advance," says the SEC source close to the hush-hush, ongoing investigation.
When investigators hauled Carlssin in for questioning, they got more than they bargained for: A mind-boggling four-hour confession.
Carlssin declared that he had traveled back in time from over 200 years in the future, when it is common knowledge that our era experienced one of the worst stock plunges in history. Yet anyone armed with knowledge of the handful of stocks destined to go through the roof could make a fortune.
"It was just too tempting to resist," Carlssin allegedly said in his videotaped confession. "I had planned to make it look natural, you know, lose a little here and there so it doesn't look too perfect. But I just got caught in the moment."
In a bid for leniency, Carlssin has reportedly offered to divulge "historical facts" such as the whereabouts of Osama Bin Laden and a cure for AIDS.
All he wants is to be allowed to return to the future in his "time craft." However, he refuses to reveal the location of the machine or discuss how it works,
supposedly out of fear the technology could "fall into the wrong hands."
Officials are quite confident the "time-traveler's" claims are bogus. Yet the SEC source admits, "No one can find any record of any Andrew Carlssin existing anywhere before December 2002."
Weekly World News will continue to follow this story as it unfolds. Keep watching for further developments.
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Ralfphie: Yeah, ECU should move up nicely along with other juniors with the price of gold at least that's how I've got it figured. It has been thoroughly beaten up in the last month or so because of position dumping by the Prudent Bear Fund so there has been some coiling, this is pretty much working its way out now. During the last runup, it went from 5 cents to 9 cents in a few days and topped at 15 cents a short time later. Those were exciting times.
There are a couple of links below here right from the horse's mouth from January and a more recent one that may point to some warts, I don't see a rollback in its future, but who really knows, anything is possible. The mine is working now, that's gotta be good. It'll probably be a slow trader though for awhile, depending upon the POG.
In the past, Nesbitt has crossed it down when it gets up a bit, just a penny at a time mostly when it was moving between 4 and 5 cents. Other houses get a little playful with it at times as well, but stronger demand takes care of that. The financials should be released soon as well and that may, or may not, draw it down a bit for awhile, hard to say though. I'll probably take it as another entry point if it does happen, but I'm pretty much loaded up at a good price as it is.
stockhouse.ca
the second one is a continuation
stockhouse.ca
This one is mostly about Prudent Bear leaving its position
stockhouse.ca
Hey KastelCo, thanks for the memories. Yeah, nice clean sound on good ole Frankie eh? A flat top, tasty mouth harp and brushes on a snare or a suitcase or something. It sounds like it was recorded in a hotel room with the guy on harp in the bathroom. I love it. Before I became committed to substance abuse and R&B for a bunch of years there, I used to be able to hit those high notes LOL. Now, I've become much more...ummm...mature in the vocal department. I do a mean "Mr. Grinch" for Christmas though to surprise the kids.
1962, I remember that year well, I couldn't wait for 1963 so I could get my driver's licence and get that '40 chevy on the road that Dad and I'd been working on since I was 13.
It's great to see that Maria Bartiromo has such a fan base...I should have taken that for granted though...sigh...
Happy Trails,
Lenny |
